04/15/2026
Here's my latest recording written about a woman I loved… inspired by Esther Perel and her research on relationships where she shared that in almost every relationship, one person is afraid to lose themselves and the other is afraid to lose the other person.
The opening line “if stress is a killer” was inspired by Gabor Maté where he explains that stress literally causes damage to your cells and is directly linked to many different kinds of chronic illness including cancer.
This song flowed out of me as I wrestled to know if my current relationship was healthy... whether it would work for us both to be free to be ourselves while we fought to love each other... ideally with our whole hearts.
There was a time in our relationship where I was told that she felt "watered down"... this burned me. I don't believe it was meant to be hurtful but the fact that me being me wasn't allowing her to be her was confusing, frustrating, and disheartening. We both fought to try and allow each other to be free and the reality is that there were many times when I truly did feel very supported.
Aggghhhhh... relationships can be tricky eh? And I have heard many couples share a similar story. I think that one of the most important keys is to constantly be open, honest & vulnerable... with yourself and each other. And although this particular relationship didn't end up in a happily ever after fairy tale, I thought it may be important for people to hear (and my current partner actually really encouraged me to record it).
FUN FACT: "RIVER" was written on a picnic table at Schoolhouse Beach on the California coastline during my road trip in 2024 as I took a Leadership course down there.
Massive thanks to Shona Lynne & David W. Swanson for their contributions on this along with Daniel Nevins for the artwork
LISTEN HERE:
Life Coach Kelowna
