05/15/2025
Iβm not a hundred-dollar bill to be liked by everyone. πΈ
(I love this saying β it perfectly illustrates what is considered Β«likableΒ» in our culture.)
Honestly, it took me about 30 years to truly be okay with the idea that not everyone is going to like me β or that to be liked, I donβt have to constantly please everyone.
By Β«totallyΒ» okay, I mean about 95.8% π
Thereβs still a fine line between βI want to please this person because I genuinely care about themβ and the anxiety of losing the title of being nice, reliable, caring, interesting β and everything else I thought I had to be in order to finally love myself.
An important side of all the interactions in my life is how I want to look in my own eyes.
But now I understand that itβs not the interactions that define my self-image, but the other way around: how I see myself β how aligned I am with my own values β defines how I interact with people around me.
Because at the end of the day, everything comes down to the most precious relationship in my life: the one with myself. π
And sometimes, listening to your inner voice is easy β you donβt even think about it. πΏ
Other times, thereβs a battle between Β«I want toΒ» and Β«I have to,Β» and no matter how it ends, you end up feeling like a loser.
So what to do? π€
A few simple questions I sometimesπ
ask myself when making decisions about interacting with other people might help:
πWhy would I really want to do this?
πWhy wouldnβt I want to do this?
π Is it comfortable for me time-wise and place-wise?
πIs it comfortable for me mentally and physically?
π What do I gain if I decide to do it anyway?
π What do I lose if I decide not to?
π Do I truly want to do this?
And yes, sometimes I end up doing things I would rather not, with people I want to avoid, sacrificing my time and energy, just because I gain more than I lose in my personal value system.
Or Iβd like to think so! π
And that is totally fine!
At the end of the day, I know Iβm not here to be everyoneβs favorite. Just to be my own favorite person in the world. ππ