18/05/2026
π Banter Vibes Matchday 14 πΏπΌβ½π₯
1 is for only 1 win each for FC Hunters, TelOne FC and Agama FCβ¦ gentlemen, are you playing football or collecting participation certificates? π
2 is for only 2 wins by ZPC Kariba, Manica Diamonds and Triangle Unitedβ¦ at this rate, the wins are arriving by donkey cart! π΄β½
3 is for 3 defeats suffered by Herentals College, Simba Bhora and MWOSβ¦ not too bad, but the log table is starting to ask questions! π
4 is for 4 losses by Bulawayo Chiefs and ZPC Karibaβ¦ one more slip and the relegation committee starts sending emails! π©π
5 is for 5 wins by Dynamos, Simba Bhora, Ngezi and Chicken Innβ¦ enough to brag, but not enough to sleep peacefully! π
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6 is for 6 draws by Dynamos and MWOSβ¦ these teams donβt lose easily, but they also love sharing points like Christmas groceries! ππ
7 is for 7 goals scored by ZPC Kariba, FC Hunters and Manica Diamondsβ¦ the strikers are fasting from goals! ππΎββοΈπ₯
8 is for 8 wins at the top for Hardrock FC and CAPS Unitedβ¦ the big boys are eating sadza with meat while others are chewing log-table pressure! ππ₯
9 is for 9 goals conceded by CAPS United and 9 draws by Highlandersβ¦ CAPS leaking here and there, while Bosso are addicted to βpoint each, thank you!β π€π
10 is for 10 goals conceded by Ngezi, FC Platinum, MWOS and Chicken Innβ¦ defence not terrible, but not exactly Fort Knox either! π§±β½
Zimbabwean football is not for the faint-hearted the log table is now a comedy script with relegation subtitles! ππΏπΌπ₯