17/11/2025
Dear Past Me,
Wow nine years sober !
I think about you often.
The version of me who was hurting, numbing, escaping, and trying so hard to feel okay. I miss you sometimes — not the chaos, but the girl underneath it all.
I’m sorry I had to leave you the way I did.
One day I just walked away from you, from the bottles, the nights you don’t remember, the mornings filled with regret. It probably felt like abandonment, like I turned my back on you.
But the truth is, I didn’t leave you behind.
I carried you with me.
Every step of these nine sober years, you’ve been right there, reminding me why I chose a different life. You were not a mistake. You were the reason.
I know you were doing your best with what you had. And I wish you could see us now the life you would’ve missed if you kept going down that road. The people, the memories, the strength, the pride, you would have never believed any of it could belong to you.
But it does.
And it’s beautiful.
Thank you for surviving long enough for me to take over.
Thank you for holding on, even on the nights you didn’t want to.
Thank you for giving me the chance to build this life . A life where I wake up clear, grateful, present, alive.
Nine years sober.
Nine years becoming the person you always hoped you could be.
I don’t know exactly what I’m destined for yet, but I know it’s something big. Something meaningful. Something built from everything we fought through. And I’m finally starting to see glimmers of it.
So here’s to you, my past self , the girl I left behind but never stopped loving.
I miss you.
I honour you.
And I promise I’ll make every year ahead worth what you went through.
With love,
The woman you grew into ❤️
never forgotten what u did for me that day ❤️
❤️