EquiBalance Equestrian

06/08/2026

Before you correct a gripping rider, you need to understand what you are actually looking at. Whether it is the knee clamping against the saddle, the entire leg squeezing the horse's barrel, or the hands locking down on the reins; it is a nervous system response to feeling unsafe or unbalanced and the body grips because it is trying to hold on. Telling a rider to relax their grip without addressing the underlying instability or anxiety that is causing it is like telling someone to let go of a safety rope before they know how to swim. You need to find the root cause first then fix it with the right tools.

The Gripping Knee
The gripping knee is the most common but also the most consistently misaddressed grip in the saddle. It almost always comes from one of two places, either the rider is using the knee to balance because the seat is not yet independent enough to do that job on its own or the rider is genuinely anxious and the knee grip is a self preservation response that happens below the level of conscious control.

What works to help fix a gripping a knee...

1. The frog leg exercise at the halt. Ask your student to drop their stirrups and draw both knees up toward their chest in both an exaggerated and deliberate way. The seat drops back onto the seat bones immediately and the rider finds genuine balance without any knee grip at all. Slowly lower the legs back down and pick up the stirrups while holding that feeling. Long leg, heavy heel, no knee grip. Repeat until the feeling becomes familiar.

2. Lunge line work without stirrups. On a quiet horse on the lunge remove the stirrups and ask the rider to focus entirely on letting the leg hang heavy and long. Without the stirrups to brace against and the steering to manage, most riders release the knee grip naturally within a few minutes. When the stirrups come back, the knee stays softer because the body has found an alternative way to balance.
No stirrup sitting trot on the lunge demands more from the seat than the walk and a rider who can sit the trot on the lunge without gripping has found the independent balance that makes the knee grip unnecessary. Build to it progressively by starting with the walk first, short intervals of trot, rest, repeat.

The Tight Gripping Leg
A leg that clamps against the horse's barrel throughout the ride is almost always a balance issue compounded by tension. The leg is squeezing because the rider does not trust their seat to keep them on and is using the entire lower body as a vice grip instead. It also creates a horse that becomes dull to the leg over time because constant pressure stops registering as a meaningful aid.

What works to help fixing a tight, gripping leg...

1. Asking the rider to deliberately open the leg away from the horse's side for a few strides - not dramatically, just enough to feel the space and then allow it to drape back down softly without squeezing. The contrast between gripping and draping is often the first time a rider realizes how much tension they have been holding. Do it at the walk repeatedly until the drape becomes the default rather than something they have to consciously create.

2. Rhythm counting out loud. Ask your rider to count the walk strides out loud. The moment they open their mouth and commit to a rhythm the leg tension usually drops. Tension lives in a held breath and a held body so give the body something else to do and the grip loses its grip.

3. Two point at the walk. In two point, the leg must support the rider's weight without squeezing for balance. A rider who can hold two point at the walk and trot with a relaxed draping leg is building the specific muscle memory that makes leg independence at all gaits possible. Build it progressively and hold the standard of a soft leg throughout.

The Gripping Hand
Hard and unforgiving hands that cannot follow the horse's mouth are almost always a rider using the reins to balance. This usually happens when the seat is not yet independent and the reins are the last line of defense between the rider and falling off and the hands know it even when the rider does not. Telling that rider to soften their hands without fixing the seat is asking them to let go of the thing keeping them on the horse.

What works to help fixing a gripping hand...

1. Lunge line work without reins. Take the reins away entirely and watch what happens to the hands. Without the reins to grip they float, soften, and find a natural relaxed position almost immediately. When the reins come back they come back softer because the seat has had to do the balancing work and the hands have had a chance to remember what soft actually feels like.

2. The sponge exercise. Give your student a small sponge or stress ball to hold in each hand while they ride. Ask them to hold it firmly that it does not fall but gently enough that they do not crush it. You can also have them imagine holding a bird in their hand tight enough to prevent it from flying away but not crushing it. That is the feeling of correct rein contact. The physical object in the hand gives the nervous system something concrete to calibrate against and breaks the automatic death grip pattern faster than any verbal correction.

3. Riding with the reins in one hand. Ask your student to take both reins in one hand and rest the free hand softly on their thigh. Immediately the body has to balance without the reins as a crutch and the rein hand which is now holding both reins softens because it is not in a position to grip effectively. Try it at walk and trot in both directions. The softening is usually immediate and noticeable.

4. Rein squeezing exercise at the halt. Ask your student to hold the reins normally and slowly open and close each hand alternately in a gentle squeezing and releasing rhythm. It breaks the static locked grip and introduces the concept of an elastic active contact rather than a fixed holding one. Simple and effective as a reset between exercises when the hands have gone hard again.

Gripping in any form is the body's honest response to feeling unsafe or unbalanced. Correcting the grip without addressing what is driving it will produce a temporary fix at best. Find the root balance, tension, anxiety, and/or core weakness and address that directly. The grip will release when the body finally feels safe enough to let go.

What is your go to exercise for helping a rider release a grip?

06/03/2026

A lost stirrup is rarely just about the stirrup. It is almost always a symptom of something happening further up the leg such as a gripping knee, an unstable lower leg, a foot that has crept too far into the iron, or an ankle that is bracing rather than absorbing. Losing a stirrup is a symptom. The position fault that causes it is what needs to be addressed and it is almost never just about the heel. Here is what is actually going on and how to fix it...

1. The gripping knee pushes the lower leg back and up.
This is the most common cause of a lost stirrup and the most consistently misidentified one. When a rider pinches with the knee, the knee essentially acts as a fulcrum and thus the lower leg (the calf) tends to fly backward away from the horse's side. This is the mistake that some instructions make by telling the rider "heels down" when the real instruction should be release the knee. A gripping knee cannot produce a stable lower leg regardless of how much the rider tries to push their heel down. Fix the grip and the heel position almost always improves without another word about it.

2. The lower leg has no independent stability.
A lower leg that swings with every stride has not yet developed the muscle memory and strength to stay in one place independently. The leg likely moves because the rider does not yet have the neuromuscular control to hold it still while the rest of the body moves with the horse. This takes time and specific exercises to develop and heels down as a correction does not build it. You have to train the stability directly.

3. The stirrup is on the wrong part of the foot.
Stirrups belong on the ball of the foot which is the widest part just behind the toes. A rider who has pushed the foot too far into the stirrup is a position where the foot cannot maintain a correct heel down position because the ankle joint is blocked. Check foot position before you correct anything else. Sometimes the fix is that simple.

4. The tread angle does not match the rider's natural foot position.
Some riders naturally turn their toes out slightly. Some turn them in. A stirrup iron that forces the foot into an unnatural rotation creates tension in the ankle and lower leg that contributes directly to stirrup loss. Adjusting the expected foot angle slightly can make a significant difference for riders who consistently lose stirrups despite correct lower leg work. For western, I love using stirrup turners because they keep the stirrups in the correct riding position as opposed to you fighting the fenders. I am not sure of the name for the english stirrup ones, but MDC makes them where the stirrups are on a swivel and can be changed to three different positions. I personally love to use these for myself and my students because it beats "fighting" your tack.

Here are some exercises that actually build the stability to keep the stirrups...

- No stirrup work at the walk:
Start with regular walk work without stirrups and doing exercises such as transitions, direction changes, halt to walk, all help to develop the independent leg position. A rider who can walk without stirrups in a correct stable position is developing the muscle memory that transfers directly into stirrup work at faster gaits.

- Single stirrup work:
Drop just one stirrup. This isolates each side independently and reveals asymmetries in lower leg stability that riding with both stirrups masks. The side that loses the stirrup most often is almost always the weaker or tighter side. Work it specifically rather than drilling both sides equally and hoping the weaker one catches up.

- Two point at the walk and trot:
Two point position requires the rider to balance entirely through the lower leg with weight sinking into the heel and the stirrup bearing the rider's weight directly. A rider who cannot hold two point has not yet developed the lower leg stability to keep a stirrup reliably at any faster gait. Build two point progressively through halt, walk, trot, until it is solid before expecting stirrup security at the canter.

- Transitions without stirrups:
Walk to halt, halt to walk, walk to trot and back, all done without stirrups. Every transition tests the lower leg's ability to stay in place while the body manages a change in energy. A leg that stays stable through a transition without stirrups will stay stable through the same transition with them. Use transitions specifically to develop the stability rather than just drilling gaits in straight lines.

Losing a stirrup consistently is a position problem that no amount of heels down correction will permanently solve. Find the root cause such as a gripping knee, unstable lower leg, incorrect foot position and address it directly with exercises that build the stability rather than just reminding the rider it is missing. If you fix the leg, the stirrup takes care of itself.

What is your go to exercise for building lower leg stability in your students?

05/30/2026

05/29/2026

Talent is not what builds lasting rider success. Neither is the right horse or the right barn, the right show schedule, or the most expensive equipment. The riders who are still riding twenty years from now and who keep improving, who stay connected to horses through every season of their life, who look back on riding as one of the defining threads of who they are - got there through something less glamorous and more reliable than any of those things. Here is how...

1. A solid foundation built without shortcuts
Everything in riding sits on top of something else. Balance before posting trot. Posting trot before sitting trot. Sitting trot before canter. Correct flat work before jumping. A foundation that was rushed produces a rider who looks competent until the work gets hard and then everything held together by habit and the right horse falls apart. A foundation built properly produces a rider who can apply what they know to any horse in any situation because the skill lives in their body not in the specific circumstances that taught it to them. Take the time to build it right because the shortcuts always cost more than they save.

2. Consistency over intensity
Two lessons a week over two years produces a better rider than ten lessons a week for two months followed by a long break. The nervous system needs time between sessions to consolidate what it learned. Muscles need recovery to develop correctly. Feel develops through repeated exposure over time not through cramming. The riders who improve most consistently are not the ones who ride the most in any given week, they are the ones who show up regularly over a long period of time without significant gaps. Consistency is unglamorous and it is the single most reliable predictor of rider development that exists.

3. The ability to handle failure without quitting
Every rider fails... regularly... at every level. The missed lead. The refusal. The lesson that felt like three steps backward after a week of progress. The show that went nothing like it did at home. The horse that had a bad day and took the whole ride with it. The riders who last are not the ones who never fail; they are the ones who developed the ability to absorb failure, extract what it is telling them, and come back next week without carrying it like a verdict. That resilience is built gradually through a program that normalizes struggle and teaches students that a bad ride is information not a judgment.

4. A genuine relationship with the horse
Riders who treat horses as vehicles for their own progress plateau. Riders who develop genuine curiosity about the horse and who want to understand how it thinks, what it feels, why it does what it does, keep growing long after the technical instruction stops being the limiting factor. The relationship between horse and rider is where the most sophisticated riding lives. Collection, self carriage, lightness, harmony... none of these are achieved through correct aids alone. They are achieved through a rider who has learned to listen as much as they communicate. Teach your students to be curious about their horse and you teach them something that carries forward into every horse they will ever ride.

5. Mental skills developed alongside physical ones
A rider with excellent position and no mental game will fall apart under pressure every single time. The ability to manage nerves, reset after a mistake, ride with focus and intention rather than anxiety and autopilot, and trust themselves in the moments that matter are skills that need to be developed deliberately alongside the technical ones. They do not arrive automatically when the riding gets good enough. They have to be built and they have to be practiced and the instructor who understands that is the one whose students perform in the arena the way they perform at home.

6. A community worth belonging to
Riders who have people around them like other riders who understand the journey, an instructor who genuinely invests in their progress, a barn culture that celebrates effort and supports struggle, stay in the sport significantly longer than riders who are doing it alone. Connection to a community gives riding meaning beyond the skill itself. It makes the hard days worth coming back from and the good days worth sharing. Build that community in your program deliberately and you build something that retains students through every season of life that would otherwise pull them away.

7. An instructor who teaches the whole rider
Not just the position and not just the aids. The confidence and the resilience and the horsemanship and the feel and the self trust and the ability to think clearly on a horse that is not cooperating. The instructor who teaches all of these things and sees the whole rider, not just the technical development, produces the riders who are still riding at forty and fifty and sixty and who bring their own children to lessons one day because riding gave them something they have never been able to fully explain but have never wanted to be without.

Lasting rider success is not a destination. It is a direction, built one honest lesson at a time, by a student who keeps showing up and an instructor who keeps seeing them clearly.

What do you think is the single most important factor in building a rider who lasts?

05/27/2026

"He should...."

People living in a fantasy land of "should" will have no capacity in the moment to deal with reality.

"He should listen to me,"
"He should just pick up the canter when I ask"
"He shouldn't look around"

Whatever your "should" is, face reality. Should is the fantasy, what is happening right now is happening regardless of our ideas. The horse didn't read the manual, watch the videos, or listen to the podcasts. He doesn't know what "should" mean, and the more time we spend blathering on and complaining about what they are and aren't doing, the less time we are actually riding.

"Shoulds" keep us REACTIVE, instead of PROACTIVE. It creates emotionally charged riding, which gets abusive before we even realize it. From our "should" perspective, we feel a righteous justification, but from the outside can look like a straight on temper tantrum.

If you are facing a behavior or situation and find yourself with the "shoulds," pause. Breathe. Think. What is it you want? Why is the horse doing or not doing what bothers you? How will the horse bridge the gap from where they are to where you want them to be? How will you make this work? You may need to ask for help, or just slow down, but all of these are better options than getting reactive.

It is essential when riding to understand theory and how each moment of a horse's interactions with us translates to the bigger picture - how leading translates to cantering and so on, to keep us riding logically and not reactively.

05/27/2026

“This makes me feel like I don’t know how to ride!”

I hear that all the time when I’m teaching and I always have to chuckle. There is nothing I can relate to more deeply!

There is a huge difference between mashing a horse’s body around, and actually riding them.

When my teachers taught me to truly ride generating energy from behind and steering the shoulders, not the mouth, it became very apparent I was relying entirely on the head for control. It was extremely humbling, and very frustrating. I had many lessons that felt like purgatory - not advancing until I could learn to direct with my seat onto a track of travel, learning not to let my over active hands get involved and to actually funnel the energy through.

I went from overactive, micromanaging riding to being floppy and ineffective, afraid to be at the helm. I’ve been at this a while, and I always remind my students of this : I did not pop out of the womb understanding this- and if you are naturally gifted at it, I’m happy for you - but don’t be alarmed if it is hard.

If it were easy, everyone would be doing it!

If you’re feeling frustrated, inept, stuck in purgatory, and so on, try to remember this is not easy. It’s very simple - but it is the most difficult task you could undertake: mastering your body and mind to ride in a harmonious way with a horse. There are no shortcuts, no easy get out of jail free cards for learning how to direct fluidly without interference. Buddhist monks study a lifetime at a monestary to get control of their minds - so you have to direct that kind of energy and dedication into it, within the walls of your own arena.

It’s hard, and you will struggle and make mistakes, but you will be just fine, and so will your horse. It will come together in glimmers, in tastes- you’ll get motivated by a little feeling here and there, and you can remember that feeling to get you through the next plunge back into purgatory.

05/27/2026

There is a big difference between giving a horse a release and teaching a horse to find the release.

In the very beginning, when a horse is first started and we are teaching that horse to soften its face, the lesson is usually very simple. I pick up one rein. The horse feels that pressure. The instant the horse softens in that direction, I release the rein. That release is what tells the horse, “Yes, that was the answer.” At that stage, the release has to be quick because the horse does not yet understand what I am asking. I am not trying to hold the horse there. I am not trying to shape the whole body yet. I am simply teaching the horse that when it feels that rein, it should soften and give.

That is an important lesson, but it is only the beginning.

Too many riders stop right there. They teach the horse to give its face, then they spend the next several years picking up, getting a little softness, and immediately throwing the rein away. Then they wonder why the horse never learns to carry itself. They wonder why the horse never develops true collection. They wonder why the horse feels soft for one second and then falls apart the moment the rider quits holding the rein.

The problem is not that the release was wrong. The problem is that the horse was never advanced past the first stage of the lesson.

A young horse or green horse needs to learn that the pull of the rein is coming. At first, the horse may wait until the rein actually makes contact before it gives. Then, as the horse begins to understand, it starts to bring its head with the rein. The contact gets softer. The horse starts to follow the rider’s hand instead of waiting to be pulled. That is a major change in understanding. That is the point where the horse is no longer just reacting to pressure. The horse is beginning to look for the answer.

That is what I mean by teaching the horse to find the release.

When a horse has learned to find the release, the rider’s job starts to change. Instead of simply picking up the rein, getting softness, and immediately letting go, the rider can start putting their hand where they want the horse to be. Then they hold that position and allow the horse to find it. The horse learns that the answer is not just to move its face away from pressure. The answer is to place its body where the rider is asking and stay there until the rider releases.

That is a very different level of training.

This is also where a lot of people misunderstand what they are seeing. They think every time a rider holds contact, the rider is taking from the horse. They think the horse is being denied the release. But there is a difference between pulling on a horse that does not understand and holding a position for a horse that has been taught to search for the answer. One creates resistance. The other creates understanding.

When the horse is ready for that next stage, the rider should not always release the instant the horse gives. The rider may hold that contact for a couple of seconds before releasing. Then the release itself should become slower. The hand should not sn**ch, jerk, grab, or throw the rein away. The contact becomes smoother, and the release becomes smoother. The horse learns that the rider’s hand is not something to escape. The rider’s hand becomes something to follow.

That is where the horse starts learning self-carriage.

Self-carriage does not come from constantly giving the horse away. It also does not come from holding the horse together with force. It comes from teaching the horse to allow the rider to shape the body, hold that shape for a moment, and then gradually build the strength and understanding to stay there longer.

At first, that might only be two seconds. Then it becomes five seconds. Then ten seconds. Then the horse can hold that shape through a maneuver. Then through a circle. Then through a pattern. Eventually, the goal is for the horse to carry itself in that balance without the rider having to constantly hold every piece together.

That does not happen in one ride.

A horse has to build the muscle to carry itself that way. It has to develop strength through its back, loin, hip, stifle, and hock. It has to learn how to drive from behind while staying soft in the front. It has to learn that softness is not just bending the neck. Softness is letting the rider influence the whole body.

That is why true collection takes time.

A lot of horses are taught to give their face, but they are never taught to carry their body. That creates the illusion of softness. The horse may flex its neck. It may tuck its nose. It may feel light in the hand for a second. But if the hind end is not engaged and the horse is not learning to hold its body in balance, that is not collection. That is just a horse moving its face.

The face is the doorway, not the whole house.

In the beginning, I may reward the smallest try because the horse needs confidence. I may pick up one rein and release the instant the horse gives because that horse is learning the language. But as soon as the horse understands the basic answer, I have to start developing the lesson. I have to teach the horse that the rein does not just mean “move your head.” It means “follow my hand, soften your body, shape yourself, and stay with me.”

That is the progression many riders miss.

They are so focused on giving the release that they never teach the horse to search for the release. They release so quickly and so completely that the horse never learns to stay in the correct position. Then the horse becomes dependent on constant reminders. Every few strides, the rider has to pick the horse back up because the horse was never taught to hold itself there.

There is a time to release quickly.

There is also a time to hold long enough for the horse to understand that the correct answer is not just finding the position, but staying in the position.

That is the difference between basic softness and advanced training.

The better trained a horse becomes, the more the release becomes part of a conversation instead of just an escape from pressure. The horse learns that the rider’s hand is not punishment. The horse learns that contact is not something to fear. The horse learns to stay mentally connected to the rider and physically organized underneath itself.

That is when you start to feel a horse become truly broke.

Not because the horse hides behind the bit. Not because the rider can pull its head around. Not because the horse has been flexed a thousand times. The horse becomes broke because it understands how to find the answer, hold the answer, and carry the answer forward.

That is where self-collection begins.