12/07/2023
On the left, I was the most unhealthy I have been in my life. But I wouldn’t have admitted it at the time.
*trigger warning*
I was skipping meals, barely eating 800 to 1000 calories per day, and spending HOURS doing cardio. I was *constantly* thinking about food; Both because I was worried about consuming too many calories, and because I was starving.
I was running on pure adrenaline, with no energy, until my hair started falling out.
This is where my relationship with food became disordered.
Eventually, all of the unhealthy habits caught up to me. My body retaliated against me. My metabolism slowed down to where I couldn’t keep the weight off anymore.
I started gaining weight uncontrollably. I started binging, and restricting even more. And I kept falling into the same unhealthy patterns for years. Hoping that the next diet would fix me.
So much has happened between these two photos. It took me years to finally get out of the diet mentality. To learn how to eat in a way that supported my body, instead of trying to attack it.
I look back on that girl with such compassion. I felt so insecure, and lost. I thought that being as small as possible would make me happy. But all it did was make me sick.
Today, my whole outlook on food and health has changed completely. I eat almost three times as many calories as I used to. I have energy throughout the day. I enjoy all the food I want. And I go to events and parties without stressing about the food.
I wish I could go back, and tell that girl on the left what I know today. But, mostly, I’m just happy that I didn’t give up on myself.
I’m fortunate enough to be able to tell my story. And to help other women to let go of the diet mentality, and heal their relationships with food.
It *is* possible to reach your goals in a healthy way. Don't give up on yourself. ❤️
*If you are concerned that your eating habits are too extreme, or that you may be experiencing an eating disorder, please reach out to a qualified mental health professional.
