Darshana Avila, Oakland, CA (2026)

05/28/2021

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’s week of action Day 5: Commit to Keep Fighting. Artwork by Amir Khadar (.khadar) commissioned by and . Take action now at weekofaction.colorofchange.org
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05/20/2021

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Our heteros*xual scripts put pe*******on as the main event. When w/ other women, pe*******on is optional. And, when alone, less than 1% of women pleasure themselves exclusively with pe*******on. Instead, they stimulate their cl****is, either alone or coupled with pe*******on.
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One of many reasons why the journey to is so important.

Two actually.

More ***ms for all of us with ***as and AND deeply needed *xPositive for one and all.

and get partners who are enthusiastically onboard to learn how to touch you in the ways you desire.

05/17/2021

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You might be wondering why today is necessary. In short, trans & q***r people are targeted all around the world. And we need your allyship right now.

Swipe for a few things to know 👉🏼

And I’ll add…
***rlove

05/15/2021

Perhaps you've noticed a recent IG update that lets us add in our profiles. If not, refresh your app. And read on if you'd like to understand more about what this means and why it matters, especially if you're cisgender, or confused about what that even means.

{also yay IG! I still have a VERY complicated relationship with you/your rampant of *xpositive and content, yet here I am.}

As a cisgender person, I have the of my identity aligning with the binary gender assignation that society at large also identifies me as. I was declared female (which is actually my s*x, not my gender) when I was born because I have a ***a, raised as a girl, know myself as a woman and when most people look at me, they see a woman. My life is made a whole lot simpler because of that.

Yet our world is not binary There is such a widely diverse array of expression, not least of all where gender is concerned. Not all bodies with v***as are women. Not all bodies with pen*ses are men.

For those humans who identify as and/or , which are not the same thing, their lives often are made a whole lot more complicated because our dominant cultural norms are designed to exclude rather than include their completely legitimate, natural experience.

So if you, like me, are cis-gender, using pronouns is an act of allyship and solidarity. By normalizing the use of pronouns for all genders, we make space for and take some of the burden off our nonbinary and trans friends, family, colleagues, community members, etc. This is how we and support in our world.

Also, for some trans and [another way of referring to nonbinary] folx, using pronouns can sometimes feel confusing, particularly if they're in the process of getting to know their authentic gender identity. I mention this because as a cis-person, having of and for this experience can also be a meaningful way to lend support. We should never pressure someone to rush their decision or disclose information about their identity before they are ready. What we can do is make space for their process.

05/14/2021

. A story. . .

As I was out in my backyard today grounding between client sessions, inhaling the intoxicatingly delicious fragrance of a bursting lemon tree, I plucked this ripe fruit and placed a few blossoms where the stem had held it fast to the branch.

A is what it immediately evoked for me, which is a poignant metaphor to sit with when I consider the wars being waged across our precious right now.

What's happening in and the state. The that are woven into the fabric of America. How ++ and specifically being targeted. This list could go on and on.

Our and are deeply needed. We MUST put our and use our dollars, voices, connections, bodies, political clout and whatever else we have available to stand for , and .

Yet we must also keep ourselves and remember the and of that is the reason why we fight.

Connecting to the is one of my most essential and effective means of doing so. Evoking and through my senses, communing with nature, dropping into my body, moving my in whatever ways feel authentic and needed in the moment.

To me, and certainly many others, like the singular , author of , and erotic elder , two Black q***r women I consider teachers and am so grateful to humbly learn from, that we are has EVERYTHING to do with how show up as .

If you're with me on the journey of then you already know this to be true. But that doesn't mean reminders aren't helpful, welcome and sometimes downright necessary. I sure need them! And it also doesn't mean that you have to go the journey alone. We ALL need guidance.

So if you're feeling yourself overwhelmed about how to be in relation to all the challenges and strain and wanting support connecting to your , leave a comment, send a DM, shoot me an email. I'm here, dear one.

05/14/2021

Repost from .creates
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ACTION ALERT!🚨 Right now, as Palestinians from Gaza to Lydd to Jerusalem rise up, Israel continues to inflict disproportionate violence on them for resisting 73 years of ethnic cleansing. ⁣
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$3.8 billion of our U.S. taxpayer money goes to Israel to fund its oppression and harmful apartheid system imposed on the Palestinian people. We should have a say in how our tax money is used. Put together by and , please support Palestinians right now by contacting Congress with the following demands:⁣
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1. End U.S. Military Funding for Israel: The bombs and weapons Israel uses on Palestinians are funded by our taxpayer money. Demand that your Congressional representative supports H.R. 2590, which calls for an end to U.S. funding of Israel’s oppression of Palestinians. ⁣
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2. Hold Israel Accountable: Demand that Congress support sanctions on Israel until it complies with international law and puts an end to its apartheid regime. ⁣
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3. Uplift Palestinian Calls for Freedom: Demand that Congress center those most harmed by violence and oppression—the Palestinian people—and support their right to resist Israel’s ethnic cleansing. Answer their demands for freedom, justice, and safety.⁣
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You can easily send a letter to your Congressional rep with these demands through bit.ly/RiseUpWithPalestine (link in bio). Thank you to and for putting this together. Please make sure you follow these impactful U.S. Palestinian-led advocacy organizations for more you can do to support Palestinian rights.

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05/14/2021

How do you get yourself in the mood?

Here you see a content, s*xy, relaxed Darshana, screenshot snapped just moments before last month's gathering of The Yoniverse & The Universe, a *xMagick ritual for women.

Just moments before that, I was sitting with a feeling of low energy, lack of motivation and distance from my sensual self. And I made a decision about what I wanted to do with that experience.

I could have chosen to show up in that state, because to be 110% clear, there's space for that in these circles and I am not one to encourage bypass or override.

I am one to encourage empowered choice, however, and I really wanted to shift my state.

So I put on my favorite red , slid a black cashmere cardigan over my shoulders, danced around to some music that I know shifts me toward my s*xual self and off I went!

These circles are a sacred space designed to offer safety and permission for women of all backgrounds and orientations, whether cis or trans, to come and connect to their eroticism.

And our eroticism includes ALL of our emotionality, our creativity, our sensuality, our vitality in addition to our s*xuality. It's so much more than just our s*x.

When you step into this circle, you can bring any and all of the layers, threads and pieces of yourself. There's nothing you need to leave aside, but there's also no obligation to show up a specific way. You're at choice.

So I really hope you'll join Verana and I this Friday at 6pm PT / 9pm ET for a special edition of our cosmic erotic exploration. Link in bio to register!

05/12/2021

Repost from

🔄 . also see their page for actions to take.

My words…

As a Jewish woman I’ve been holding a very particular grief, guilt and anguish about what’s happening in Jerusalem right now, which, like all of the divisiveness that pits one ethnic, racial, political or religious group against another, is not at all new.

The othering we do amongst ourselves as humans is directly related to how we feel “other” in our own selves, in relationship to our bodies, to our Mother Earth, to beloved human and more than human kin in truly intimate, nourishing, meaningful ways.

This is not the way things have to be. We CAN nurture change. And I think we should.

Just like the U. S. CAN speak out against Israel and demand an end to and accountability for the genocide happening. And I think our president should.

Statement of fact: “injustice anywhere is a threat to justice everywhere.”

And this IS part of the work of , make no mistake. Feeling more, inhabiting our bodies and hearts more, showing up more fully in our relationships… yes, you’re going to have *x but you’re also going to be a , a , who’s doing their part to tend of and .

That’s just how it goes when you really choose to take this journey on.

05/10/2021

It's AND AND an extra special addition of The Yoniverse & The Universe this week. Phew!!

Loves, plain and simple, if you want to experience more pleasure and aliveness in your body, you've got to cultivate deep intimacy with it. This is the path.

And yes, that intimacy has space for what hurts and what you're scared to be with. Grief, rage, loss, longing and beyond all have their place in our oh-so-human experience.

So do joy, ecstasy, fulfillment, inspiration and the many pleasure-filled wonders of our emotional spectrum.

Our emotions aren't outside of ourselves. They're not other. They're so very much a part of our embodiment, so when we create a practice of , it's not just our bodies we're connecting with.

We're cultivating intimacy with our hearts, spirits and souls. Our mind and our psyche comes along for the journey too.

ALL OF YOU! ALL OF YOU!

Can you truly welcome yourself that much? Can you truly love yourself that well?

This is ultimately what I hope for when I encourage folx to start up a practice. And this is what and I are seeding in the field of possibility each time we gather for The Yoniverse & The Universe.

Join me, will you? Our NEW MOON circle convenes this Friday, May 14 @ 6pm PST/9pm EST. Head to the link in my bio and it'll give you all the details and registration info. You can also grab your free copy of my ebook, TOUCH YOURSELF if you're so inclined.

Whatever you choose, I really hope you choose to in the mix of it all.

xx
D

05/09/2021

To those who mother, who are mothers, who eschew binary titles when it comes to giving nurturance and care.

To those who long to be mothers, who choose not to be mothers, who are mothers and wish they weren't.

To those who have fraught relations with their mother, who have beautiful bonds with their mother, who have complicated, nuanced connections with their mother.

To us all, children of Mother Earth, navigating the agony and the ecstasy of our human experience, ultimately seeking to love and be loved, to know we belong.

May we find holding for all the waves of emotion flowing through our hearts, the complexity and the simplicity of it all.

May this day find us touched by even a moment of the maternal qualities that nourish and uplift us most, whether generated from within or without.

May we take the time to honor, in the way that is true for us, the source of our life that brought us here.

This day may be happy for you and it may not. Far be it for me to tell you how to feel. But that you do feel whatever is there for you, this is what matters to me. Feel what wants to be felt. Acknowledge the journey that brought you right here, right now and has shaped you into who you are.

When I guide WOMAN: Wise, Wild & Whole, my 6-mo 1:1 journey for women who are ready to claim their Erotic Wholeness, we consider the "mothering" we received, with all its imperfections, and how to resource the parts of ourselves that have been left needing and wanting. We examine the archetype of "Mother" for ourselves and what our authentic expression is, what we want it to be.

I invite you to consider this for yourself, and if you feel drawn to dive in deeper, reach my way and let's talk.

05/07/2021

Just for today, can you let the comparison game go and tune into what's truly true for you?

This is where your is to be found.

This is where your lies.

And while it all sounds simple enough, it might not feel easy to do.

It's easy for me to say but might actually feel quite hard for you to hear that voice speaking.

When I invite you to sense into your body, it's quite possible the strongest sensation is numbness.

Many of us don't actually know what our authentic needs are because we haven't been taught how to identify them let alone honor them.

is a practice as much as anything. It's a commitment to and . It's a journey of healing.

And when the time is right for you, I really hope you'll choose to take it. Because even if you choose it for yourself, the world benefits.

Individual liberation in service to collective liberation, loves!

I warmly invite you stay in touch with me so that when that moment comes, we can dive in deeper together.

Making sure you're on my email list is the way to go because when it comes to the Gram, you never know. . . 😜

05/05/2021

Here are a few things that you might want to know about your pleasure that the patriarchy doesn't teach you. . .

🔅 So-Called Selfishness Supports Good S3x
Taking the time to learn what you like and gain in communicating it creates more satisfying intimacy. And if a partner doesn't welcome your clarity, chances are they're not your person

🔅 The Best Way To Or**sm Is The Way That Works Best For You
F**k Freud and his notion of "immature or***ms". Whatever gets your where you want to go - hands, mouths, toys, other people's ge****ls - it's all good. And if you don't know how to get there, let's talk.

🔅 Rest & Relaxation Support Your Arousal
Your is often dialed into the intense, fast pace of modern life. Try slowing down for better s3x. Include a grounding, gentle warm up before you ramp up.

🔅 We All Need S3x Ed, Guidance & Support
The chances of you falling for a magical someone who knows everything there is to know about s3x in general & s3x with you in particular is slim to none. Most of us received subpar educations & there's nothing wrong with you - read: no shame - in needing pro guidance.

Unlearning what doesn't serve you/your relationships and learning to embody what truly feels good is so much of what is all about. Guidance and support are available to you. Make sure you're on my email list if you want to [un]learn even more and if you're ready to take a deep dive into your personal journey, let's talk!

Darshana Avila

05/28/2021

05/20/2021

05/17/2021

05/15/2021

05/14/2021

05/14/2021

05/14/2021

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