We go to the root, identifying beliefs, emotional patterns, and behaviors driving it so it stops repeating. I am a Transformational Guide. My Journey From Unlucky in Love to Beyond Grateful. Let’s cut to the chase: from an early age, I was a Daddy’s girl. And while I had a very strong and loving relationship with my father, there was one thing that screwed me up for a long time: his belief systems
. Dad only wanted the very best for me in life. Unfortunately, that translated into him passing on well-meaning but extremely limiting beliefs to my psyche: I was supposed to grow up, get married, have kids, and be taken care of. A deviation from that script—including following my own dreams—meant failure. But I did follow my own dreams. I worked in the fashion industry for 25 years, helping people feel good about themselves by way of their appearance. During that time, I learned that while this made people feel good—it really only was a temporary fix. I myself was hurting: searching for my pain to be eased by methods outside of myself, like drugs, alcohol, and dysfunctional relationships. This just buried the pain deeper, and made it harder and harder to see what was really there. The more I buried my pain, the more I buried who I really was. In doing so, I ran around blindly searching for what I thought I wanted: lasting and true love. I never found it, because I was coming from a place of emptiness and woundedness. The clock kept ticking. My relationships kept failing. As I got older, my father’s script turned into: you’re too old to be picky, just accept anyone that will have you. I finally got sober and did eight long years of emotional healing work and therapy—but I was still [perplexingly] single. At 40, I came to a complete state of surrender. It was so painful and scary—but I made a decision to let go of the dream life I had envisioned for myself: to be married and have children. “Besides,” I thought, “At my age, I doubt I’ll ever be able to conceive.”
However, I held onto the idea of finding my soulmate. But I knew that in order to bring him into my life, I had to do something different. I had to go deeper and more fearlessly into the inner terrain that I most feared; the “blind spots” that kept me stuck in the same cycle of disappointment and frustration. And then, something miraculous happened. It actually worked. After two years of this intense journey, rapid change began to take place. I met my incredible soulmate. A year and half later, we married. Ironically, my father passed away at the beginning of our love story, and was never able to attend my wedding. It would have been one of the most celebratory days of his life. Even though so much of what I had to heal stemmed from my dad, I loved him dearly and was grief-stricken that he couldn’t be there. But, unbeknownst to me, more joy was to come. At age 45, my husband and I experienced a miracle that surprised everyone, especially us. I became pregnant and gave birth to our son, a beautiful healthy baby boy. I tell my story because I know that so many people are suffering, believing that they aren’t good enough, or that there’s something “wrong” with them. I know that these same people “go to work” on themselves—whether through healing methodologies or destructive habits—trying to fill the emptiness that they think only a partner can fill. But this isn’t a “happily ever after” story: this is a Happiness Ever-Unfolding Story. There’s always layers of healing to do, more self-discovery to be revealed, and an abundance of self-realization to actualize. If being “lovable” were a destination, nobody would ever get there! But loving and communication within relationships is a journey—the journey of growth and continual blossoming into truer and truer versions of ourselves, and our relationships. My husband and I are still in this process, learning more about communication and fulfillment in marriage and effective, compassionate parenting. Believe me, the growth does not end when you finally find your soulmate! Nobody is perfect, and nobody is supposed to be. There is hope, and there’s nothing wrong with you! You can find lasting, incredible love—at any age. My work is a distillation of everything I’ve learned in the last four decades about self-love, partnership, and living a life of your dreams. I’ve helped my clients reclaim their serenity, heal wounds that no other modality [including therapy] was able to help, and find lasting love—starting with loving themselves. I know I can help you as well, if you’re ready. And I know, deep within my soul, that you deserve it [even if deep down, you’re still not sure if you do].
