Dear Mixed Girl

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Dear Mixed Girl ® Creator and Owner | Coaching Multicultural Girls (and Their Parental Figures) on Topics of Diversity, Identity, and Leadership | Diversity, Identity, and Cultural Proficiency Speaker
https://www.dearmixedgirl.com

International Youth Day calls us to consider what young people are carrying while they are still becoming. Mental health...
08/12/2026

International Youth Day calls us to consider what young people are carrying while they are still becoming. Mental health, discrimination, economic uncertainty, social pressures, education, safety, and questions about self are not isolated experiences; each can influence how a young person understands the world, relates to others, and imagines what is possible for the future.

Identity is woven throughout that human experience, especially during adolescence when young people are learning to understand themselves amid messages from family, culture, schools, communities, and society. Mixed and biracial youth may also encounter misidentification, assumptions based on appearance, pressure to choose between parts of themselves, or expectations to explain an identity that belongs to them. Respecting their dignity means creating enough safety for self-understanding to develop without requiring constant defense or explanation.

A vital part of Dear Mixed Girl® is the belief that identity development deserves intentional care because what young people experience—or lack—can follow them into adulthood, workplaces, and leadership. Emotional intelligence, self-awareness, humility, the ability to listen and follow, and respect for diverse perspectives all shape how people lead and the impact they are capable of creating. Supporting young people well today helps cultivate adults who can lead more responsibly tomorrow.

07/06/2026

On July 16th 2016, I said yes. Who would've known what God had in store for us in countless blessings, adventures, and togetherness?

10 years in, forever to go. The Forever Youngs.

Dr. D Ivan Young

Being loved at home does not always mean every part of a child’s identity feels understood, protected, or known. For mix...
06/30/2026

Being loved at home does not always mean every part of a child’s identity feels understood, protected, or known. For mixed and biracial girls, the quiet gap between love and understanding can show up in family comments, school forms, identity questions, cultural assumptions, and moments when adults do not know how to read what she is carrying.

Love becomes safer when it is willing to listen without defensiveness. Real support takes humility, preparation, emotional intelligence, and the courage to keep learning before a child has to shrink, explain, or prove herself.

Read “Loved Deeply, Yet Still Not Fully Understood” through Dear Mixed Girl®:
https://dearmixedgirl.com/loved-deeply-not-understood/

Dear Mixed Girl® is also on Substack for readers who want weekly reflections and letters delivered directly to their inbox.

This week’s Dear Mixed Girl® conversation has centered on the harm beneath the question “What are you?” and today’s lett...
06/27/2026

This week’s Dear Mixed Girl® conversation has centered on the harm beneath the question “What are you?” and today’s letter answers that question with love, faith, and wholeness.

For many mixed and biracial girls, the question can make identity feel like something to defend before it is something to celebrate. A girl may feel expected to explain her family, her features, her culture, her background, or the parts of herself other people think they have a right to inspect.

Today’s Dear Mixed Girl® letter offers a different reminder: she is not a category, fraction, puzzle, or side to be chosen. She is a design, a mosaic of God’s creation, and a whole person with every part of herself carrying meaning, beauty, and purpose.

Mixed girls deserve language that affirms their wholeness before the world teaches them to shrink, explain, or divide themselves for someone else’s comfort. Self-love can become an exclamation, not a question mark.

Dear Mixed Girl®, you are not a “what.” You are essence, uniqueness, truth, love, and God’s child.

Read today’s letter here:
https://dearmixedgirl.com/you-are-a-design/

06/27/2026

“You are not a what.”

Today’s Dear Mixed Girl® letter is a reminder that mixed and biracial girls are not categories, fractions, puzzles, or sides to be chosen. You are whole, divinely designed, and created with every part of who you are carrying purpose, beauty, truth, and love.

When the questions come, may self-love rise louder than the pressure to explain.

The written version of this letter can be found at the Dear Mixed Girl® website through the link in my profile.

Questions can either help us grow or place a weight on someone who never agreed to carry it.Today’s archive piece, “Quer...
06/25/2026

Questions can either help us grow or place a weight on someone who never agreed to carry it.

Today’s archive piece, “Query or Lesson,” returns at an important point in this week’s Dear Mixed Girl® conversation. Monday’s anchor sat with the harm beneath the question “What are you?” and today’s archive connection brings another layer forward: not every question is wise, caring, or necessary just because someone feels curious.

A real query can create space for prayer, patience, reflection, and understanding. A question rooted in entitlement can make a person feel examined, reduced, or responsible for explaining something deeply personal to someone who has not earned access.

This matters for mixed and biracial girls because questions about identity, family, race, culture, and belonging should not become moments where a child is expected to explain herself, defend her parents, or carry the discomfort of the person asking. Growth cannot only be expected from the person being questioned. The adults, families, schools, churches, and communities around her must also learn when curiosity has crossed into intrusion.

Questions can open understanding, but wisdom must guide who asks, how they ask, and whether they have earned access to the answer.

Read “Query or Lesson” through today’s Dear Mixed Girl® lens:
https://dearmixedgirl.com/query-or-lesson/

There is a difference between wanting to know someone and studying her like a set of clues.When a mixed or biracial girl...
06/22/2026

There is a difference between wanting to know someone and studying her like a set of clues.

When a mixed or biracial girl is asked, “What are you?” the question can land in the body before it ever becomes an answer. Her skin, hair, features, name, parents, and family story can suddenly feel placed on display, as if someone else has decided she must be explained before she can simply be respected.

A child should not have to become evidence in someone else’s racial guessing game.

This week’s Dear Mixed Girl® reflection names what often sits beneath the question: the invasion, the belittling, the pressure to explain parents, the casual “half this and half that” language, and the expectation that the person being reduced should still respond with grace.

Mixed girls deserve language for self-identification, but the work cannot stop there. Families, educators, churches, youth leaders, and communities also have to confront the people doing the questioning, correcting, and diminishing.

A mixed girl’s dignity is not earned through explanation.

Read the full reflection:
https://dearmixedgirl.com/mixed-girls-identity-questions/

06/19/2026

Happy !

There are times when staying rooted is not about refusing to grow. Staying rooted becomes about knowing who you are well...
06/17/2026

There are times when staying rooted is not about refusing to grow. Staying rooted becomes about knowing who you are well enough not to let every question, assumption, opinion, or uncomfortable space pull you away from yourself.

Today’s Dear Mixed Girl® archive piece brings forward an older writing, *Don’t Sway in the Wind*, and connects it to the identity pressure mixed and biracial teens may experience when the world keeps asking them to explain, simplify, or defend who they are.

A mixed teen deserves support that helps her stay grounded in the fullness of her story. Families, educators, ministry leaders, mentors, and children-centered professionals all help shape whether she feels steady or pulled in too many directions.

Read *Don’t Sway in the Wind* here: https://dearmixedgirl.com/dont-sway-in-the-wind/

Be Blessed and Be At Peace.

Mixed and biracial teens often learn early that the world likes categories more than it understands complexity.A questio...
06/15/2026

Mixed and biracial teens often learn early that the world likes categories more than it understands complexity.

A question like “What are you?” may sound casual to the person asking, but for a young lady living between cultures, the weight can be much deeper. One answer is being requested from someone whose story may hold more than one family line, more than one culture, more than one history, and more than one way of understanding herself.

When a biracial teenager is expected to make identity smaller, simpler, or easier for other people to understand, belonging can begin to feel like something she has to earn. Families, schools, churches, and communities carry a responsibility to offer language where confusion has been left alone, gentleness where pressure has been placed, and affirmation where silence has lingered.

A young woman carrying more than one family story is not a checkbox, a question mark, or an incomplete combination of separate parts. Her identity is allowed to carry complexity without losing its wholeness.

Read the full article here: https://dearmixedgirl.com/mixed-identity-beyond-boxes/

Be Blessed and Be At Peace.

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