05/03/2020
This is so well said and so true.... a lot of PTSD horses we retrain have come from training situations that have always asked the wrong question in the wrong setting at the wrong time🐴
There's a question that comes up a lot about the "creating connection through a change in focus" exercise. It's been coming up more and more lately with the release of the "reconnecting with your horse during coronavirus" videos for my sponsor Weaver Leather, and also with the videos I did with Bella on using it to help with separation anxiety.
The question has to do with grass.
"What if my horse won't stop eating the grass when I'm trying to facilitate his focus shifting to me" is basically the content of the question.
My answer differs depending on the situation. If your horse has been locked up for 12 hours in a stall, and the only large area you have to try this exercise in has a lot of grass, then you may have to make a judgement call.
You may have to decide that the "creating connection through a change in focus" exercise is not the best decision to make then, and you might decide to try to get more connection some other way, such as matching steps, or even just standing or sitting and being present.
One of the principles of training is "They need to know the answer before you ask the question".
But ensuring they know how to do something before you ask them to do it, is not enough. You also need to have the judgement to decide "in this situation, do I know I can get a yes answer". If the answer is no, then that situation is not a good place to ask that question, regardless of whether they could do it the day before.
I love Elsa Sinclair's quote "good leaders only ask yes questions". Asking only yes questions proves to your horse a lot about you as a person. It shows your empathy, it shows you are present and reading each situation, and strengthens your connection to them.
Every time you ask a no question, asking a horse to do something that, at that moment, he is unable to do, you wear away at his confidence in you. It's the same as if a man proposes to a woman waaaay too early in the relationship, and she says no. Not only is it a no, but it also tells her that the man is not good at reading social cues. Men are pretty good at this part, usually we can read the situation well enough to know we are going to get a yes, before buying a ring, and getting down on one knee. We still have a lot of work to do, but that's one thing we get right.
I see many horses that are spooky, not because they are a spooky horse by nature, but lack confidence in the rider because of many interactions where the rider over faced the horse."Over facing" is a term commonly used in the jumping world to describe what happens when you ask a horse to jump too high a jump. They quit. They lose confidence in their ability to make it over the jump, and they lose confidence in the rider's judgement.
But over facing is not about just jumps. You can do it at any time during your interaction with your horse during the day. And the more times you do it, the less confidence they have in you.
I have a lot of people say "oh you are so talented", but I don't think it's about talent. Talent to me sounds like a physical thing, like catching a ball or riding a unicycle. What I believe I do is just make good decisions, that only result in yes answers. That's not to say I won't push a horses boundaries, and ask for new things, but I always set it up so the objective is within reach, and never setting myself up for failure.
I've said it before, I'll say it again. It's not a method, it's a mindset.