M E Selleck Coaching

04/25/2024

"Life is never perfect. We all live some form of Option B"
-Sheryl Sandberg & Adam Grand in the book "Option B"

As mothers, we often carry the weight of our own childhood experiences while striving to create a better future for our children.

We may never get our idealized 'Option A'—the childhood we longed for and deserved. But we can rewrite the script for our children, offering them the love, support, and emotional connection we yearned for ourselves.

🫂Research indicates that secure attachments and emotional resilience in childhood lay the foundation for healthy relationships and well-being later in life.

🌱So, while we can't change our past, we hold the power to shape our children's future—a future filled with warmth, empathy, and emotional connection.

💪By embracing our 'Option B,' we pave the way for our children to thrive and break free from the cycles of emotional unavailability. Together, let's rewrite the narrative and create a brighter, more connected tomorrow.

If you want help navigating your "Option B," reach out for a free consult to see if my 16-week program is right for you. Link in BIO.

04/19/2024

💗As children, we all have a deep, innate need to feel seen, heard, and unconditionally accepted by our parents. But for those of us raised by emotionally immature mothers or fathers, that craving for love and validation often went unmet.

Research shows the lasting impacts of this emotional neglect can be profound. Studies have linked growing up with emotionally unavailable parents to:

➡️Difficulty forming secure attachments and healthy relationships as adults
➡️Struggles with low self-esteem, anxiety, and depression
➡️Challenges regulating emotions and setting appropriate boundaries

The good news is, it's never too late to heal these deep-seated wounds. By learning to offer yourself the compassion and acceptance you deserved as a child, you can break free from the limiting beliefs and harmful patterns that have held you back.

In my work as a parent coach, I've seen firsthand the transformative power of this inner child healing process. Clients report feeling more confident, emotionally balanced, and able to create the nurturing, fulfilling family dynamic they always craved.

🌱If you're ready to do this vital work, I encourage you to check out the resources in my bio. It could be the first step towards reclaiming your birthright of wholehearted love - both for yourself and your loved ones.

✨You deserve to feel safe, seen, and worthy exactly as you are. Let's work together to make that a reality.

https://www.meselleckcoaching.com/CPSwebinar

04/17/2024

When you grow up with an emotionally unavailable parent, you often struggle with poor boundaries and a tendency to put the needs of others before our own. This people-pleasing habit can leave you feeling drained, resentful, and unable to show up as your best self - for your families or for yourself.

But the research is clear - protecting your energy through self-care and boundary-setting isn't just an act of self-indulgence, it's a vital form of self-love. Studies show that those who prioritize their own needs and emotional well-being are far more likely to:

✨Regulate their emotions in healthy, productive ways
✨Recognize and avoid toxic, draining relationships
✨Model confident, centered behavior for their children
✨Experience greater life satisfaction, resilience, and mental health

In other words, when you make the courageous choice to safeguard your energy, you don't just benefit yourself - you create a ripple effect that positively impacts your entire family system.

So the next time you feel the pull to say "yes" when you really want to say "no," remember the wise words: "The greatest act of self-love is to protect your energy." It's not selfish - it's self-preservation. And it just might be the most generous gift you can give to the people you love.

💖💪If you're ready to dive head-first into healing and truly unlearn the junk from childhood, so you can be the best version of yourself and model health to your children, check out my FREE training with the 3-steps to raising confident children.

https://www.meselleckcoaching.com/CPSwebinar

04/16/2024

When we grow up with emotionally unavailable parents, it can leave a lasting impact on our ability to feel worthy of love and connection. Research shows that children of emotionally distant or abusive parents are more likely to struggle with:

👉Poor self-esteem and feelings of unworthiness
👉Difficulty regulating emotions and setting healthy boundaries
👉Unhealthy relationship patterns that mirror their dysfunctional upbringing

🌱The good news is, it's never too late to break these generational cycles. With the right tools and support, we can heal the wounds of our past and become the calm, confident, and emotionally connected parents our kids deserve.

That's the mission behind my 3-step process for raising confident and emotionally intelligent children. It's all about:

✨Healing your own parent wound so you can show up as your best self.
✨Developing practical strategies to regulate your emotions and foster deep bonds with your kids.
✨Modeling healthy behaviors that empower your children to thrive.

If you're ready to transform your family's story, head to the link in my bio to learn more. It could be the first step towards creating the positive, nurturing environment you always wished you had.

03/27/2024

Check it out!

"How to Recover From Being A People Pleaser"

Authority Magazine

An Interview With Brooke Young & Yitzi Weiner

03/11/2024

🤱Perfectionism anxiety is many times the result of insecure attachment to caregivers in childhood.
👋Perfectionists were either SEEKING connection through being perfect (ie "they'll notice me and give me affirmation), or AVODING negative attention through being perfect (ie. "I need to fly under the radar and avoid conflict).
🧠The thoughts and beliefs they get stuck on are:
👉"If I'm not perfect, then I'm a failure."
👉"If It's not perfect, then I'm disappointing people."
👉"If I'm perfect, then I will have worth."

💪If you want heal the impacts of and emotionally unavailable mother, and overcome the distress that perfection is causing you, feel free to reach out for a free consult call to see if were a good fit!
LINK IN BIO

03/07/2024

Most people pleasing behaviors coming from not being treated as a priority as a child, leading to a belief that you are “not good enough.”

Children who grow up with emotionally unavailable parents find ways to maintain connection to people around them to survive. Many times the children attempt to make everyone around them happy, specifically their parent. In fact this can also become their ‘role’ in their family.

People pleasing becomes about making other people happy out of fear of the loss of connection. This fear of loss can even be traced all the way back to birth and our biological need for connection with the resulting behaviors that we develop in response as efforts to maintain any connection we can.

Do you want help breaking away from these kind of behaviors as they relate to growing up with an emotionally unavailable parent? Do you want to make sure your children are not held back by these behaviors? Reach out and book a free consult to see if we're a good fit! LINKS IN BIO!

02/22/2024

We often find ourselves trapped in the belief that prioritizing our own well-being equates to selfishness.

🚫 But here's the truth: self-care isn't selfish; it's a vital act of self-preservation.

🌿 It's time to dismantle the misconception that valuing ourselves means devaluing others.

Do you want help breaking away from this kind of thinking as it relates to growing up with an emotionally unavailable parent? Reach out and book a free consult to see if we're a good fit! LINKS IN BIO!

02/19/2024

✨ In this journey toward healing, it's crucial to understand that the coping mechanisms that once shielded us may now cause distress. What once served as a lifeline in the storm of trauma can become a barrier to peace and growth in adulthood.

Reach out if you want to know more about unlearning the junk! LINKS IN BIO

11/19/2023

Reminders!