12/26/2024
’Twas the day after Christmas, a day to be seen,
When Mrs. Claus urged Santa, “You’ve gotta get lean!”
Feasting on cookies and hooked on caffeine,
Santa was sluggish, exhausted, and mean.
Rudolph was weary from pulling the sleigh,
While Santa spent weeks at the North Pole Buffet.
The scale at the Pole read three fifty-four,
Santa had grown, and they knew he’d gained more.
Rudolph had told him, with a pre-Christmas chat,
“Santa, I’m sorry, but you’re just too darn fat!
You’ve got to do something!” the reindeer exclaimed.
“Last year we had back pain that left us all maimed!”
So Santa decided, right after his toll,
To stay in Colorado and play in the snow.
He set out a plan to get back to his best,
And Rudolph and friends earned a much-needed rest.
He went to his room and took off his suit,
Stood in his boxers, thinking he looked cute.
Then he caught his reflection and cried, “HO-HO-HECK NO!
I look just like that fellow made of Pillsbury dough!”
To his wondering eyes appeared quite a sight—
Ten extra pounds to his belly and his height!
He groaned even louder and threw quite a fit,
Then called up his doctor, “I need to get fit!”
The doctor replied, “Santa, it’s time to trim down.
Drugs aren’t the answer, but I’m glad you’re in town.”
“Your blood pressure’s up, your glucose is high.
It’s time for a change, or the reindeer won’t fly!”
“There’s help right nearby, the best in the state—
Call this trainer; he’ll get you in shape!”
With tons of experience and a top reputation,
This trainer could guide Santa’s transformation.
Doc grabbed the phone and called Joe real quick,
“I need your expertise for my patient Saint Nick.
His muscles are weak, his health’s in decline,
He’s got to drop pounds and get back in his prime!”
Joe promised to help, with no gimmicks or lies,
And Santa set out to regain his size.
He logged on that night and found all the proof
At www.trainwithjoe.com—fitness truth!
Santa was ready, committed at last,
To leave all his unhealthy habits in the past.
No wraps, no fads, no j***y quick fixes,
Just real training and healthy mixes.
The reindeer rejoiced, their backs pain-free,
Santa was finally the man they’d dreamed he’d be.
With Joe’s program, Santa worked out each week,
Learning new drills and toning his physique.
Through snow he jogged, his spirits soared,
And Mrs. Claus smiled as her Santa restored.
By next Christmas Eve, Santa’s suit fit him snug,
The reindeer no longer needed a chiropractor’s tug.
Rudolph was thrilled, the elves cheered with delight,
And Santa stood tall, his health shining bright.
This year, make your goals stick, no more tricks!
Take inspiration from good ol’ Saint Nick!
Visit www.trainwithjoe.com and start your plan—
Because if Santa can do it, so can you, man!