09/01/2026
A recent BJJEE article shared Kevin James talking about one of his first experiences with jiu jitsu. He was trapped underneath someone, couldn’t figure out how to escape, felt like he couldn’t breathe and started panicking.
I think stories like this are important because Kevin James isn’t describing something unusual. He’s describing what a lot of beginners feel.
Jiu jitsu is learned behavior.
If you’ve never trained and suddenly another person is crushing you from the top, your natural reaction might be to push, grab their throat, buck wildly or do anything you can to escape.
That’s why it sometimes surprises me when experienced practitioners complain about trial students being spazzy.
What do you expect them to do?
They don’t have jiu jitsu yet.
The experienced grappler has learned to breathe, frame, protect the neck, create space and wait for the right opportunity. Those reactions eventually become second nature.
But the beginner hasn’t developed them yet.
That’s why I always say the learning curve at white belt can be one of the hardest parts of jiu jitsu. You’re going to be the nail for a while. You’re going to feel helpless sometimes.
Some people experience that and never come back. Others leave thinking, “How did that person do that to me? I need to learn this.”
A good beginner program should help people experience that reality gradually without unnecessarily intimidating them.
Eventually, the panic starts disappearing and technique takes its place.
That’s when jiu jitsu starts becoming your second nature.
Do you remember the first time you felt completely helpless in jiu jitsu?