29/05/2026
I’m feeling calm,
I’m feeling anxious,
I’m feeling excited,
I’m feeling happy.
How can you tell? 🤷♀️
Ruby is feeling lazy.
Whinney is feeling grumpy.
Mocka is feeling mischievous.
River is feeling boisterous.
Why do you think that? 🤷♀️
What do you observe?🤷♀️
These questions will feel familiar to anyone who’s participated in a programme at Balance.
I must admit, when I was first asked “how can you tell?” I responded with:
“What do you mean? I’m feeling calm because I feel calm.”⁉️
But how do you know you are calm?🤷♀️
What do you notice?🤷♀️
What are you feeling in your body?🤷♀️
Calm is the interpretation of the felt body sense. Sometimes we can be quick to interpret, quick to “manage” a feeling before we’ve really held space to feel it. 🏃♂️
When we work with horses, we often talk about the pause before interpretation. ⏸️
Because the truth is we can feel and interpret our own feelings (it takes practise!) but we don’t know what our horses are feeling. We don’t know what other people are feeling.
What we can do is observe. Interpret. Ask questions. Stay curious. Explore different possibilities. 🕵️
“Ruby is feeling lazy.”…Why do you think that?
Maybe we observe that she’s moving slowly, or saying “no” when asked to move forward.
But are there other interpretations?🔎
Maybe she’s tired,
Maybe she’s sore,
Maybe she doesn’t understand the cue,
Maybe she’s feeling worried.
Is there more information available?🔎
Can a vet, coach, bodyworker or another observer help our observation? What questions can we ask ourselves and others?
And if there are multiple plausible interpretations… what is the most generous one? ❤️
When we come across behaviour we don’t expect or don’t want, we often interpret quickly in an attempt to solve the “problem”.
Less pause.
Less exploration.
Less generosity.
We all carry our own experiences, fears and biases into our observations and interpretations.
If I’ve known many horses who bucked because of pain, I may overestimate the likelihood that a bucking horse is in pain.🤕
If my horse was once bitten by a dog, I may unconsciously look for evidence that my horse is afraid of dogs now. A curious sniff… in my eyes a fearful snort. 😱
The interpretations themselves may still be true. The horse may be in pain. The horse may be scared.
But it’s worth asking:🧐
Is my interpretation being shaped by past experiences?
Is my brain trying to protect me?
Is there more information available?
What is the most generous interpretation?
We might not know for sure. But we can pause.⏸️
And in case you need the reminder, it’s okay to feel the feeling in that pause. It’s okay for your horse to feel something too.😮💨
It might be uncomfortable.
Take a breath.
Feel the feeling.
Stay curious enough to explore.
What you find may surprise you.💕
