10/06/2026
Four photos from our piece ‘Shadow Self’ performed at 💜
These images capture the weight of the invisible burdens that mental struggles and illness can bring. Fighting an enemy that no one else can see, fighting against yourself.
The last photo marks the turning point. The weight had become too heavy. The anger had been building for so long, and I finally started fighting back.
One of the hardest parts of this routine for me was the scream. A real scream that came from a place of pain and anger. Because of that, I had to reconnect with my past and with old feelings. Again and again. During training and eventually on stage.
As heavy and uncomfortable as that scream was, I’m so grateful that it was part of this routine. Even though my illness is behind me, I feel that every scream has helped me let go of a little more of that weight.
A special thank you to my friend and doubles partner .baker.sa for putting up with me screaming in your face again and again. I’m forever grateful that you wanted to play this role.
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