16/02/2021
Hey, Love. It's been a day now since I held your head in my hands and repeated "I'm sorry. I love you. Thank you" with tears streaming down my face while I watched you take your last breaths. It's been 24 hours since I saw what little light that was left go out of your eyes, and felt your body go limp. It just sucks, watching you go from what looked like a completely healthy and happy dog, to dead from cancer in only 18 days. I wonder if you were already feeling sick, but the sight of me just always made you so happy that you didn't care. It feels like it's only been a minute since I last saw you, and you're going to come running through the door after your walk. We were suppose to have another 2 or 3 or even 5 years to hang out and go on adventures...
I’m walking around the house and I feel like something is missing.
As you laid there, and I could feel a part of myself die.
I remember how we would take a nap together everyday when I came home, 8 years after being adopted and I think you were still afraid that I would leave you, because you'd always touch me while you were asleep, just so I couldn't go anywhere without you knowing. Even the night before you left us, despite the pain you were in, you jumped up and ran to the door when I was there.
Over these years your unconditional love, patience and bubbly nature has taught me so much. I know you hated me working while I was at home cos all you wanted was to spend time with me and show me how much you loved me! I’m guilty that many times I got so caught up in my work that I ignored you and I am sincerely sorry for not taking that moment and giving you the love you were looking for. Nothing in this world can ever take your place in my heart and I don’t know if I will ever get over your loss but I do know that your memories and love is what is keeping me going and always will!
RIP my loving Google! I’ve lost my best companion but I’m sure you are in a happier place!