24/08/2026
part one of reshaping my relationship with food after bodybuilding prep... after everything I’ve learnt about food, my body and myself🪞
I’ve struggled with disordered eating since I was 12 and it took me years to admit it, years of recovery, and a lot of work to understand where those behaviours came from and build a more peaceful relationship with food🥺
and for a long time, I genuinely felt like I had done that
pregnancy and postpartum actually helped me more than I ever expected. having to let go of control, trust my body and focus on nourishing myself and my baby completely changed the way I saw food and my body❤️🩹
so when I went into bodybuilding prep, I knew it would challenge me, but I also felt confident that I had the tools to navigate it
and I did learn a lot but I also found myself in conflict more than I expected
because when you spend years learning to fuel your body, listen to hunger and respect what your body needs, bodybuilding prep asks you to approach food in a very different way
and then comes the post show period - the part nobody really prepares you for
the hormonal shifts, depletion, unpredictable hunger, changes in your body and suddenly having a lot less structure around food💭
in a weird way, it has reminded me of early postpartum🤱
and that has made me think a lot about the women I work with, especially mums, who are trying to navigate nutrition while their body, hormones, identity and relationship with themselves are already changing
sometimes the problem isn’t that you don’t know what to eat
sometimes there is a much bigger relationship underneath it all that needs attention⛓️💥
so I’m sharing the messy part of this journey too🤗
not because I have all the answers, but because I think we need to talk more about what happens after the goal, after the diet, after the transformation
this is part one 🤍
