25/05/2026
Having difficult conversations in sport is never easy.
As a coach, I don’t really want to tell parents to sit their child down and have a conversation about basketball. However, if your child leads the conversation and comes to you upset, frustrated, or confused about game time, maybe these are some questions that can help guide the discussion in a positive and constructive way.
A common scenario:
“My child is working really hard, but they’re still not getting extra game time.”
Instead of immediately giving answers, try asking questions that encourage self-awareness and reflection:
🏀 Did I get past the ball in transition?
🏀 Was I first back on defence?
🏀 Did I turn over the basketball unnecessarily?
🏀 Did I create opportunities for my teammates?
🏀 Was I willing to put my body and heart on the line for the team?
🏀 When I was on the bench, was I engaged and supportive, or was I only thinking about when I would get back into the game?
Coaches love players who contribute both on and off the floor.
🏀Sometimes there’s a personality clash.
🏀Sometimes it’s about experience.
🏀Sometimes it’s effort.
🏀Sometimes it’s ability and capability.
And sometimes it’s simply that players ahead have been in the system longer and have earned trust over time.
As a parent, it can be incredibly difficult to watch your child feel sidelined or continue in a sport without getting the opportunities they hoped for.
There are a few important things to remember:
🏀Sometimes junior players simply need time.
🏀Sometimes players need difficult conversations with coaches about what they need to improve.
🏀 Sometimes players need difficult conversations with themselves.
Most young athletes will naturally look to their parents for answers.
You can either keep them comfortable, or you can help them become reflective, resilient, and accountable.
Growth often begins when players honestly assess where they are in their game — not where they wish they were.
I hope this helps.
— HoopSkool Basketball Academy 🏀
