27/03/2024
Building Grit: Authentic and not something you can fake.
A topic I love reading and hearing about is peoples endeavours through struggle and the character they developed through the experience of coming out the other side. Sometimes they’ve been successful and other times it’s given them a new perspective on life but ultimately, they’ve all stayed in the fight and gained something from the experience.
I find it inspiring, and it reminds me every day to hold myself accountable to a standard I want to set for myself and make sure I can look at myself in the mirror knowing I’ve shown up when I didn’t want to and put myself forward through experiences even when I didn’t feel like doing so. By doing this you’ll develop what people call grit.
I thought this would make for a good article in its relevance to coaching.
“Grit” Is a big factor behind how I coach as the people I’ve coached over a period of time would vouch for. I expect people to show up every day and fight, whether the chips are down, or they feel on top of the world, I expect people to show up and compete with themselves and each other every day to get better and not bring excuses as to why things aren’t working or why we shouldn’t have to do so.
For example, last season was a test of this when I was 14 games into my first season coaching first grade rugby and my team hadn’t picked up a win. As the head coach it was important that I owned the responsibility of the results but also showed up each and every day, ready to motivate the team to move forward and to keep showing up for each other to fight through the adverse experience. Ultimately, we failed but one thing I don’t think anybody would say is that we didn’t go out without swinging.
Did I feel like doing this every day? Absolutely not. There were some days where I’d have loved to have taken the opportunity to blame others or locked myself away for the day but ultimately, I knew I had to show up and keep persevering not only as it was my job but also because I knew I’d learn a lot about myself and the others around me in the face of adversity.
I can look back knowing that I owned my stuff and kept a level head when my character was being tested under pressure. I now know the answer to a lot of questions that were being asked of me in my own head as I answered them by showing up and staying true to my character and in the fight.
I was first introduced to the concept of developing Grit when reading a book by Angela Duckworth simply called GRIT. It’s a psychological examination of the concept of grit. In summary, Angela highlights how your effort is the most important aspect in life. Through passion and perseverance towards your long-term goals and keeping going even when you feel down, or a task seems impossible. People often focus on talent, but it means nothing if the effort isn’t there. By doing this is will allow you to develop grit which will allow you to bounce back from failures or setbacks.
Now if I relate this to my coaching, I think it’s important individuals acknowledge that their success is rented and not owned, and that rent is due every single day in the actions that they take. I use a saying ‘kill or be killed’ every single day when coaching or training myself. It started in jest when doing something tough but now it’s a reminder that that you either deliver in the here and now or somebody else will. Basically, show up and get the work done else somebody else will do it for you and take your place.
This is why in the people or teams I coach I expect people to show up every day trying to improve else you’ll go backwards due to the people willing to show some grit and stay in the fight that will keep progressing forward. If you are willing to show up every day you will get your rewards. As stated, it could be success in terms of winning a game (took me 15 attempts), a league or a cup. For me personally it was knowing my strength of character stayed intact under pressure and having the confidence in myself knowing this moving forward.
Building grit into people is not a smooth road, you get it through adverse experiences and getting through them which is going to look different for every individual reading this article. Think about your own experiences and how they’ve helped define you as a person, when did you feel like giving up, but you pushed through it? Now think how do I use this concept as a coach?
For me personally as a coach the main thing people need when going through adversity is support and honesty. It’s not simply a case of breaking somebody down and seeing if they can build themselves back up, it’s not a one size fits all approach. Every person will need something different from you. Think about how you can build this into your training methods and how you can support the growth of grit into individuals and the team.
Grit has got to be authentic and not something you can fake. Ultimately people will see straight through you if you don’t have it. As a player for example, it could be showing up on days you don’t want to and doing things you don’t want to do but doing them anyway to the best of your ability as you know you need to. It’s the willingness to push past your comfort zone and find out about who you actually are. It’s making sure you hold others accountable to the standard you know that needs to be set and sticking to it.
As the coach you can provide an environment for your athletes to do this but ultimately, they must go through the experiences themselves to develop it. This can happen in training or games. Your job then becomes offering that guidance and support to stick to task and push themselves through their comfort zones. Like anything they will be a risk and reward. The more you push people the more chance of something snapping so make sure this is factored into the equation. I’ve got this wrong many a time but made sure I’ve learned from every experience.
As people grow stronger, both physically and mentally, the more they can be pushed. Again, relating this to coaching - this will look different to different age ranges as well. For example - A training drill performed at first team level may be a 5/10 in terms of overall difficulty for the people performing it. The same drill at academy level may be 9/10 for the people performing it. This could be down to several factors, it could be the speed of the passage of play, it could be the manipulation of certain skills or energy systems and the threshold people currently have to it. As a coach you need to be aware of this and the desired outcome you want to achieve. You also need to be aware of this when coaching younger members in a first team setting to make sure you know when to save them from themselves.
I use a drill in defence called the 10 wins game. In a nutshell you must defend a channel of your choosing (20,30m etc) with a small number of players and gain 10 defensive wins. A win is defined as a player on their back with a controlled pin and peel to marker and a set defensive line. You get a point for each tackle win with the idea being if you front up and get 10 wins on the bounce you are straight in and out of the drill. Sounds easy doesn’t it. You lose points by the opposition getting an offload, making a break, or poking their nose through for a quick play of the ball.so you could be on 9 points, have 2 offloads performed (-2) get a quick play the ball (-1) and then not have a set defensive line (-1) suddenly you are back at 5 points. It tests all aspects of your tackle technique and ruck defence system along with the mental aspect of pushing through adversity.
Now the obvious benefit of this drill is stress testing tackle technique and processes under fatigue. As you tire your technique becomes tested and could become sloppy so it’s a good drill to see how robust your defence is. As a coach you can see whose technique needs support and whether your system can handle stress as you thought.
It also helps build grit into players as the secondary part of the drill as a coach is looking for who gives in when it takes 20-30 contacts to get the 10 wins and who keeps getting off the floor and putting themselves forward again. I absolutely love this drill for this reason.
Players will fail and it’s important to understand that and make sure you offer that honesty and support in your feedback to help them become better. Players will ultimately know what made them reach break point as well, it could be they simply give in as it got too tough, it could be a bad day etc but as a coach its important you facilitate that learning experience for them and make sure they feel supported enough for them to be honest with you so you can help facilitate learning.
As I coach, I think it’s important to also understand people change and so do different generations. What built grit into our grandparents or parents would not necessarily transfer into younger people of today. Their values will but they’ve grown up with different experiences and contrasting environments so it’s important you adapt coaching methods and experiences to accommodate this.
I personally see grit as a lifelong learning and a commitment to an emotional and intellectual investment in myself and the people I coach. Making sure I show up every day for the people that count and do my part to try make it better. I enjoy rolling up my sleeves and paying my deposit as effort is the only thing that counts.
Hope you get something from this and can take something away.
Cheers
Mash