10/11/2024
"But you can't run. You have a stick." Quite possibly the most stupid, and most hurtful, thing anyone has ever said to me.
Living with two conflicting conditions is exhausting. On the one hand, I have fibromyalgia, a chronic illness that causes all over aches and pains, leading to exhaustion from trying to live a normal life. On the other hand, I have lumbar spondylosis, the deterioration of the discs in my lower spine causing constant pain.
How do they conflict when they both cause pain, I hear you ask. Well, to recover from a fibro flare, I need to rest. To ease extremely high levels of lumbar pain and stop my hips and lower back from seizing, I need to exercise and running in particular really helps.
It is a very difficult balance, and means that training every day can be a real battle, especially when the fibro is hitting hard. I have just been referred to a spinal surgeon to see what, if anything, can be done about my lumbar spine.
But, while I can still run, I darned well will! It is the only time I do not feel pain, and it really helps with my mental health and clarity. I feel free when I run. As a disabled person, that feeling is beautiful and I will not be giving it up easily.
