24/12/2020
Happy Christmas to all perhaps the following should sum up the year:- AN ALLOTMENTEERS LAMENT
Twas the night before Christmas & all-round the plot the slugs were a gobbling eating the lot
The gardener came down slug pellets in hand to deal with these pests just as he’d planned
Brussels came first needed for the next day but found they had blown & slugs had had their way.
Then to the parsnips but to his horror he found they’d succumbed to hollow crown & canker those well-known diseases oh what a flanker
With heavy heart he dug all around, but none had been spared not even the little uns seems nobody cared
He went to the carrots surely they’ll be ok, Oh dear carrot fly’s been & had their way
He dug some potatoes & what did he find blight had attacked not one had survived
Thinking ahead he goes to the swedes but alas they had bolted all gone to seed
Next to the turnips surely they’ll be alright but damping off & cut worms oh what a sight
Next to the onions but what did he find onion fly & thrips oh what a bind
He trudged up the hill his veg trug was empty he’d come back with nothing but thought he’d get plenty
“What shall I do, er indoors will be waiting how can I take the obvious berating”?
He went to the co-op crept like a thief they’d got it all there oh what a relief
So, “hello dear I’m home” he cheerfully called smiling to himself the crisis he’d solved
He showed her the produce, but she shrugged & said “got it from Tesco while you were in bed”
The moral of this story is obvious it’s said never trust an allotment it’ll never keep you fed