19/01/2021
The W Questions.
I've been training/coaching people for near on ten years now!
You learn a lot about human behaviour over that period of time.
Something I've noticed, is that when people are excited or enthused to try something new, they invariably want to jump in at the deep end. This, I have discovered, is not a good thing. When you discover you're not as fit as you think you are, or that the thing you want to participate in is not as easy as you thought, this can lead to discouragement, and ultimately dropping out of that thing you wanted so badly in the first place; and in some cases, it can also lead to injury.
One of the things I have learnt, during the period I've been coaching, is before I open my big mouth, is to ask myself a few questions. I use these questions to rationalise what I'm doing, but I also use them as a second guess mechanism as to what a client wants, or needs. The great thing about these questions is that, pretty much, no two people will answer them in the same way. It can be surprising the difference between what people think they want, and what they actually need. If that sounds a bit cryptic, take something that you do frequently, apply these questions to it, and then see if it changes your perception of what you're doing, why you're doing it, or how you do it.
I call these the W questions, and I urge everyone to use them, not just in relation to health & fitness, but in everyday use about almost everything.
It's simple and practical.
Here's how it works...
What, Why, How, Who, When and Where!
You will notice they all start with W, apart from How, but it ends in W, so there!
Simply just ask six questions about anything...
1.What is it that I want to do, or What is it that I'm doing? This is the most obvious one, and sometimes we just do things blindly, either by trying to copy, or because we have been told to do it. But, if we can feel in control of what we are doing, by slowing it down, dismantling the action, reconstructing the sequence, and truly understanding what is we are attempting, then ultimately, that will bring enlightenment to the task, and should make it easier (or harder, if that is the goal!), and more satisfying.
2. Why am I doing it? Again, a pretty obvious question, but sometimes dismissed. Is there something beneficial to be gained from the task, or could it be detrimental, even dangerous, to your wellbeing? Similar to above, if you don't understand Why you are doing something, it can lead to frustration, and ultimately giving up. This is where goal setting steps in, if we never see progression, or some sort of result, our motivation will go, we will become bored, and eventually give up.
3. How are you going to do this thing? Will it cost you money? Will you need equipment? Will you need a membership? Will you need a partner, or a team, or a new set of clothes?
It doesn't have to be fitness based... say you want to take up ballroom dancing! Do you need a partner? How will you find one? Will a club provide one? What about clothes? Can you enter competitions? Will you get stagefright?
Perhaps buying a car? How will you afford it? What kind of car? Why do you need it? Where will you buy it? When can you afford it?
This one question can set you off into a forest of questions!
4. Who? Another quite open question. Who will it benefit? You hopefully, but it may also impact either positively, or negatively, on others around you.
Alternatively, who are you going to do it with? A club, a coach, a trainer, a team, a partner, a manager?
You might find a good coach, but not get along with them personally, or there's someone in your team you don't like, or doesn't like you. If you become obsessed with your ballroom dancing, and are out practicing every night, who's feeding the kids? Does your partner think you're having an affair?
5. When are you going to do it? This may not seem as important as the others, but still has some impact. Wanting to do something, needing to do something, and actually doing the thing, are three entirely different concepts.
Committing yourself to doing something, and maintaining that commitment, is the long term struggle we all deal with. In this case consistency is paramount! Make a date and a time, and stick to it. As soon as you start being late, or taking a day off, you're starting down the rocky road to giving up.
6. Finally, last but not least.
Where are you going to do the thing. This may seem like the least important of the questions, but sometimes without an actual venue, a lot of tasks (specifically sports, or ballroom dancing), can't be performed properly.
This is something that has been highlighted to me over the past year; having no access to my previous facilities, has taken a great toll on my business. Only being able to train outside, or online, has hampered what I can do as a coach (inclement weather and shorter days), and I have to balance out making a living with the safety, health and wellbeing of those I work with.
Sometimes we can destroy our own dreams, simply by not understanding what it is we're trying to achieve!
I've only scratched the surface of these questions here, but I hope you can see how useful asking them of yourself can be.
They have certainly helped me adapt and overcome over this past year, I hope that they can be equally useful for you in the coming year.
If anyone wants help with their training or fitness goals, feel free to contact me on 07759667354.
Stay Strong, Stay Safe!
And Keep Smiling!
David.😃
