16/10/2022
Muirhead 6-2 Falkirk
As the sun set on Friday night a team of ageing warriors set out on a journey to claim the last piece of silverware available this season! 🏆
The lads entered the first round of the Kenny Parry Memorial Trophy with an air of confidence that normally means only one thing…victory!! The gaffer was slightly more hesitant as he knew the opposition were no mugs. They had went the distance in their own league and were only pipped to the championship post on the final game of the season. He was also conscious that 80% of the team hadn’t kicked a ball in nearly two months! Caution in the initial stage of the game was paramount.
However, the boys came out the traps firing, so it wasn’t long before the first goal arrived. Some neat passing play down the right led to a pinpoint cross being swung to the back post. Poised to convert was ‘Sargent Sare Legs’ Ryan Bell. He wrapped the nut on the ball like it was a drain pipe he used to heedbut mwi in the early naughties! The ball and keeper had nae chance. 1💥
The lads kept the pressure on which led to confusion and a misplaced pass at the back from the opposition. Big Rab the Jab pounced and then played an inch perfect pass inside beyond the keeper for the oncoming Big bad Joe Sheilds to slot home. 2 🦧
The 42 year old who wears small boys clothing, Leon Kondol, got himself into a situation where he was one-on-one with the keeper. His record of scoring approx 1 out of 10 of those type of chances would suggest the score was staying as is…but…the wee fella found his finishing boots! Slotted home! The packed Chryston High Arena fell silent in utter shock that he’d actually converted! 3 🤙
It was a night for the Polis to impress as Brian Langan, sand danced past the Falkirk midfield, composed himself and curled one into the top right corner from 25 yards. Cultured finish from the veteran copper! 4 🐷
Muirhead’s answer to the Liver King, big Rab, played out his skin and for most of the game was literally unplayable. After dragging the Falkirk defence all over the camp like a silver back making love to an inflatable s*x doll he outmuscled them and flew down the right wing to unleash an absolute bullet to get a very well deserved goal! (Joint) MOM performance from Rab. Superb! 5 🦍🍾
The moment of the match though has to go to mr groin strain himself - Big Bad Joe! A foul given 30 yards from goal. Poised over the ball every spectator thought this giant of a man was gonna blooter the ho**er right oota the ball! With row z beckoning (surely!) he started to bend his run towards the set piece. Just like Trent against the mob who shall not be named he bends the ball into the top left corner! Outstanding stuff! Got his brace and two mins later…yip…you guessed it…went off with a groin strain!🧑🦽6
Even though big Jamie ‘Simmy the cat’ Simpson let in two (neither of which he could do much about) he put in an absolutely superb performance! Rolling back the years with fantastic saves and manoeuvring around that 6 yard box with moves that an Olympic gymnast would be proud of. Incredible stuff! Joint MOM with big Rab🧤 🍾
Best performance in a while. Every player involved played out their skin! Onwards to Alexandria on Friday 21st Oct for our 2nd round match against Haldane.
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