09/06/2026
🏏 “Oh Dear, Oh Dear 🤷♂️🤷♂️…” Rain Delays Play 🏏
A gloomy, damp Saturday greeted The Originals as they prepared for the trip to Middleton Cheney. With much of Oxfordshire already succumbing to the weather and a growing list of Cherwell fixtures falling victim to the rain, the message from Cheney was cautiously optimistic, a “Not great, but no need to call it off yet.” And so, off the Marsh boys went.
Middleton Cheney has historically proven an eventful destination for MGCC. Previous expeditions have seen both J & S Leonard and Crabby Cross make unscheduled visits to Horton Hospital, making it one of the few away grounds where a first aid kit features as prominently in pre-match planning as the scorebook,bats & pads. Thankfully, this particular visit would prove less dramatic.
Upon arrival, the rain was falling steadily. For perhaps the first time in recorded history, J Leno’s collection of approximately 17 kit bags proved genuinely useful, providing enough spare jumpers, waterproofs, bobble hats and miscellaneous clothing to outfit a small expedition team.
The weather eased sufficiently for proceedings to begin on time and, at 12:15pm, Captain Stu performed one of his most reliable weekly duties, he lost the toss…surprise, surprise.
The Originals were invited to bat first in conditions that could only be described as a fast bowler’s Christmas morning. Grey skies, drizzle in the air, a damp outfield and a pitch offering plenty of assistance meant runs were unlikely to come easily.
Opening the innings were Cobby Chambers and an even less mobile than usual, J Leno. To be fair, this was one of the rare occasions where injury rather than fitness was responsible for his lack of movement. Quite the endorsement for the club’s Head of Strength, Conditioning & Nutrition and Director of Cheese.
The Cheney deck was challenging to say the least. One enormous boundary combined with a heavy outfield meant boundaries were scarce, while the overhead conditions offered encouragement to every ball that pitched. What followed was less batting and more survival..
Chambers Junior and Leonard of the J variety dug in admirably, boring the Cheney attack into submission through stubborn defence and sheer bloody-mindedness. Balls swung, seamed, spat and occasionally attempted to expire underneath the bat, but the opening pair remained unmoved. “Thou shall not pass” appeared to be the chosen batting philosophy and I certainly wouldn’t look at the strike rates on the scorecard if I were you…
The run rate crawled reluctantly above two an over, just, and while wickets occasionally fell around them, survival remained the priority. Anant “Peshy” Peshavaria came and went, skipper, S Leno received what can only be described as a peach, while Wildman Hikz Jan attempted to alter the course of the innings through brute force, albeit without making the required connection. Spuddy Honour looked composed and capable before the weather returned to interrupt proceedings with MGCC hovering around the 90-mark after 40 overs.
In truth, nobody was entirely sure what constituted a competitive total. Given the conditions, most agreed that anything between 100 and 120 would have made life very uncomfortable for the hosts.
Unfortunately, Mother Nature had other ideas. As persistent rain swept across Oxfordshire, the Cheney lads worked heroically to keep the game alive. Fruit bowls appeared under covers to collect water, brushes were deployed and at one stage kitchen roll entered the battle. Thankfully for groundsman Jules, no leaf blower was produced on this occasion.
Meanwhile, the MGCC dressing room settled into its natural state…utter nonsense. The discussion quickly turned to the worst grounds various members had ever played on, with stories becoming increasingly exaggerated as the rain continued. Alfie Cross sat coolly throughout proceedings, sporting sunglasses, a backwards cap and an enormous chain dangling around his neck, looking somewhere between Dappy from N-Dubz and Eddie Murphy.
Kyle, meanwhile, assumed the role of amateur meteorologist and DLS consultant, enthusiastically explaining ‘resource’ percentages and rainfall calculations to anyone unfortunate enough to make eye contact. With the delay becoming increasingly lengthy, tea was eventually taken and the Marsh innings officially closed.
Had we got enough? Probably not quite.
Would it have been interesting? Almost certainly.
Would it matter if it never stopped raining? Not in the slightest.
Repeated refreshes of the Cherwell website revealed that virtually no cricket was being played anywhere else. Yet Cheney, sensing that victory might still be within reach, continued emptying fruit bowls and searching hopefully for a break in the weather. Eventually one arrived. Much to the disappointment of most of the MGCC dressing room, who had collectively concluded that the pub represented a far more attractive venue than the middle of a wet cricket field…
Cheney padded up enthusiastically and took guard. Kyle had the new ball. First ball, dot. As he wandered back to his mark wearing a distinctly puzzled expression, he asked the umpires whether the increasingly heavy precipitation might warrant a stoppage. Apparently not.
Second ball. Kyle trundled in again. Bowled!! Cheney 0 for 1. Suddenly the chase wasn’t looking quite so straightforward. “Oh dear! Oh dear!” bellowed Kyle, arms raised triumphantly towards the heavens. Quite who this was aimed at, or indeed what it meant, remains unclear. Witnesses report that Kyle himself appeared no closer to understanding than anybody else upon post match questioning.
Before further damage could be inflicted by The Originals’ fearsome opening attack, the rain intensified once more. With conditions rapidly deteriorating and common sense finally prevailing, the players left the field and the match was abandoned. Curiously, MGCC’s mood shifted almost immediately. What had previously been a dressing room desperate for a cancellation was now quietly convincing itself that a famous victory could have been possible, we will never know! Not that anybody fancied standing around in the cold and rain long enough to prove it…
Shelter was sought at The New Inn, in Cheney where discussion turned to cricket’s finer laws. To the surprise, and mild concern, of many present, the LBW rule had to be explained in detail to Spuddy Honour, a man now boasting well over 100 Originals appearances!
Mercifully, no hospital visits were required this time, and the travelling party eventually returned safely to The Plough in The Mighty Gibbon.
The Originals are back at home this Saturday as they welcome Stokenchurch. See you there!
📖Scorecards -
https://marshgibbon.play-cricket.com/website/results/7363123
https://www.cherwellcricketleague.com/scorecard.php?MatchID=18784
