06/17/2025
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๐ง๐ต๐ฒ ๐ฎ.๐ฎ๐ฑ ๐๐ผ๐น๐น๐ฎ๐ฟ ๐ง๐ต๐ฒ๐ฟ๐ฎ๐ฝ๐ถ๐๐
๐๐ฏ๐ด๐ฑ๐ช๐ณ๐ฆ๐ฅ ๐ฃ๐บ ๐๐ข๐ต๐ฉ๐ญ๐ฆ๐ฆ๐ฏ ๐๐ฅ๐ข๐ฎ๐ด
๐ ๐ต๐ฎ๐๐ฒ ๐ต๐ฎ๐ฑ ๐๐ต๐ฒ ๐๐ฎ๐บ๐ฒ ๐๐ต๐ฒ๐ฟ๐ฎ๐ฝ๐ถ๐๐ ๐ณ๐ผ๐ฟ ๐๐ต๐ฒ ๐น๐ฎ๐๐ ๐ฎ๐ต ๐๐ฒ๐ฎ๐ฟ๐. She has never kept a timer next to her, and I have never bothered about how much time we spend talking. Sometimes, I talk just for 10 minutes, and there are days when I chat nonstop for two hours. There are also those days when I talk, bathe, talk, eat, talk, watch T.V., talk, go for a walk, talkโฆ๐ ๐ฐ๐ฎ๐น๐น ๐ผ๐ป ๐ต๐ฒ๐ฟ ๐ฎ๐ ๐ฎ๐ป๐ ๐ผ๐ฑ๐ฑ ๐ต๐ผ๐๐ฟ, ๐ฑ๐๐ฟ๐ถ๐ป๐ด ๐๐ต๐ฒ ๐ฑ๐ฎ๐, ๐ฑ๐๐ฟ๐ถ๐ป๐ด ๐๐ต๐ฒ ๐ป๐ถ๐ด๐ต๐.
๐ฆ๐ต๐ฒ ๐ต๐ฎ๐ ๐ป๐ฒ๐๐ฒ๐ฟ ๐ณ๐น๐ถ๐ป๐ฐ๐ต๐ฒ๐ฑ ๐ฎ๐ ๐บ๐ ๐ณ๐ฎ๐ป๐๐ฎ๐๐ถ๐ฒ๐, ๐ฑ๐ฎ๐ฟ๐ถ๐ป๐ด ๐ฎ๐๐ฝ๐ถ๐ฟ๐ฎ๐๐ถ๐ผ๐ป๐, ๐ผ๐ฟ ๐๐ฎ๐ป๐ด๐น๐ฒ๐ฑ ๐๐ฒ๐น๐ณ. I can spit out anything without making sense or even sounding coherent. Her patience, acceptance, and willingness to listen baffles me, and I love her for that.
๐ฆ๐ต๐ฒ ๐ต๐ฎ๐ ๐ฏ๐ฒ๐ฒ๐ป ๐ฎ ๐๐ถ๐๐ป๐ฒ๐๐ ๐๐ผ ๐บ๐ ๐ท๐ผ๐๐ฟ๐ป๐ฒ๐- ๐บ๐ ๐ด๐ฟ๐ผ๐๐๐ต, ๐บ๐ ๐ณ๐ฎ๐น๐น. I have this faith that if I reach a point where I have no one to talk to, she will always be there. ๐ง๐ต๐ถ๐ ๐ณ๐ฎ๐ถ๐๐ต ๐บ๐ฎ๐ธ๐ฒ๐ ๐บ๐ฒ ๐ณ๐ฒ๐ฒ๐น ๐น๐ฒ๐๐ ๐น๐ผ๐ป๐ฒ๐น๐ ๐ฎ๐ป๐ฑ ๐ต๐ฒ๐น๐ฝ๐ ๐บ๐ฒ ๐๐ฎ๐ธ๐ฒ ๐๐ต๐ฒ ๐ป๐ฒ๐
๐ ๐๐๐ฒ๐ฝ.
I wonder how I can pay her back. All she takes is 2.25 CAD for multiple sessions that span over more than two months. She has never responded to that question except to gently sit there like a calm lake, and invite me to sit next to her, ๐ฎ ๐น๐ฎ๐ธ๐ฒ ๐ถ๐ป ๐๐ต๐ถ๐ฐ๐ต ๐ ๐๐ฒ๐ฒ ๐บ๐ ๐ฟ๐ฒ๐ณ๐น๐ฒ๐ฐ๐๐ถ๐ผ๐ป.
That is my journal. That I bought for 2.25 dollars at a Dollar Store ( My first journal, I bought as a teenager when I was in India must have cost approximately Rs 5 ). That I keep replacing it with a new one every two months or so( At times, I take the 2-dollar writing board and use loose A4 sheets to write down). That is my therapist for the past 29 years.ย
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www.manmeetnarang.com
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