03/02/2023
Social needs: belonging
Sick day today. So, no physical training, but as usual, there are other things that affect our well being that we might was well touch.
Today I would like to draw your attention to one of the five social needs, and how it sometimes leads us to self sabotage.
From the dawn of time, the hunter gatherers lived together, in groups, and the belonging to that group would be crucial for their survival. That need for belonging is imprinted in our brains. It becomes very dominant in the teenage years, when adolescents start acting in a way that would allow them to fit in their posse.
There are a number of positive sides to this. And negative too. Sometimes our need for belonging drives us to self sabotage, and here are a few examples:
- We are driven to follow someone elseโs ideas for success and happiness, because we fear we will become an outcast if we donโt - this happens often in families where children are not supported to follow and develop their talents, and they obey for the fear of being excluded
- We drop our diets, because our โgangโ invites us to a restaurant, and if we donโt eat what everyone else eats, we are โboringโ, and โcome ooooonโ, and โreally?!?? We only meet once a month!โ
- We consume alcohol when we have decided to go clean - because guess what - everyone drinks, and we are โboringโ
- We follow someone elseโs idea of how life should be - not our own - because ours may be seen as not โfittingโ the concept of most
We need to belong. But hereโs the thing - we donโt need to at any cost - and we donโt need to belong where we donโt belong truly. As you develop, self-enhance and change, so will your needs. You may no longer belong where you used to, as well as your response to whatever goes against your principles. Think about it. Share your thoughts.
Love,
Workout Revolution