28/08/2026
May I share?
You may not be indecisive.
You make choices all day.
You organise, anticipate, solve problems and carry details other people do not even notice.
The difficulty may arise when your choice could affect someone else.
Suddenly, you aren’t only asking:
“What do I want?”
You’re also wondering:
How will he respond?
Will he be disappointed?
Will I have to defend my choice?
And in that moment, you may become one of two women.
The Pretzel Woman says:
“Whatever you want.”
She adapts before her own preference has time to become clear.
The Deciding Woman says:
“I’ll just choose.”
She takes over because carrying the decision feels safer than waiting, trusting or receiving.
One bends around another person.
The other remains safe by staying in control.
And sometimes, they are the same woman.
This may not be a problem with your ability to decide.
It may be what happens when allowing your desire to become visible feels vulnerable.
There is a place between disappearing from the decision and carrying all of it.
A place where you can name what you desire without turning it into a demand—or abandoning yourself when someone wants something different.
That is where The Journey Home continues.
Which feels more familiar: saying “whatever you want,” or deciding everything yourself?
If you recognise both patterns and desire support discovering what lies beneath them, message me HOME.
RelationshipPatterns WomensHealing