Insightful Conversations and Coaching

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Insightful Conversations and Coaching

I'm Susanne Fuerst, a coach who works with people who are the dependable one in every room: capable, reliable, and quietly exhausted.

Together we move from coping and performing to genuine self-trust, clarity, and a life that actually feels like yours. About Susanne and Insightful Conversations & Coaching:
I am passionate about empowering self-sufficiency and agency in myself and others. By understanding the needs of others, I can guide and support you to gain insight, enabling you to help yourself and flourish. I believe in the

strength of individuals and that you are the expert of your own story and with that the author and director of your life. However, sometimes we are too close to our own story and then my role as a coach is to help via guided questions, alternative perspectives, and tools to gain clarity and insight. I founded my practice Insightful Conversations and Coaching as progression of my 37 years professional career which led me through several countries, companies and positions as well as various experiences be it on an interpersonal, intercultural, communication level or leadership, employee engagement, company & team culture, and strategy level or engagement with clients and customers. The value of setting up my own practice is that I can take all the experience and skills and focus on what matters. Working with you to listen to your story and together work on the journey to reach your full potential and lead a fulfilled life. My practice, Insightful Conversations and Coaching, is a trauma-informed practice. This means, I understand trauma and acknowledge that approximately 50 - 70% of people will have a potentially traumatic experience during their lifetime. A trauma-informed practice aims to be aware and mindful of this fact and provide a safe, trustworthy, collaborative, and empowering environment while respecting the autonomy of the individual.

03/09/2026

𝟰 𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝗶𝗻 𝘂𝗻𝗰𝗲𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗶𝗻 𝗺𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀
When you are facing uncertainty, fears, possibilities, assumptions and unanswered questions they can begin to merge into one large problem.

Everything may feel equally urgent.
And everything you imagine may begin to feel equally likely.

Separating the different parts can give you a clearer place to stand.

Here are four questions that may help:
𝟭. 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗱𝗼 𝗜 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄?
What has been confirmed?
What has actually happened?
What information do I already have?

𝟮. 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗮𝗺 𝗜 𝗮𝗳𝗿𝗮𝗶𝗱 𝗺𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗻?
Your concerns do not need to be dismissed.
But something you fear may happen is not the same as something you know will happen.

𝟯. 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗜 𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗹𝘂𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘁𝗼𝗱𝗮𝘆?
Perhaps you can ask a question.
Gather more information.
Prepare for a conversation.
Clarify a boundary.
Or decide how you want to respond.

𝟰. 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗮𝗻’𝘁 𝗜 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗼𝗹𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗲𝘁?
There may be an answer, decision or outcome that is not currently within your influence.
It may depend on another person, additional information or simply more time.

𝗧𝗵𝗲𝘀𝗲 𝗾𝘂𝗲𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝘀 𝗺𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗿𝗲𝗺𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗹𝗹 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘂𝗻𝗰𝗲𝗿𝘁𝗮𝗶𝗻𝘁𝗶𝗲𝘀.
𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘆 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗱𝗶𝗿𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗿𝗴𝘆 𝘁𝗼𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗱𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗸𝗻𝗼𝘄 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗶𝗻𝗳𝗹𝘂𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲, 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗿𝘆𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝗼𝗹𝘃𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗰𝗮𝗻𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘆𝗲𝘁 𝗯𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗹𝘃𝗲𝗱.

02/09/2026

𝗗𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹 𝘀𝘁𝘂𝗰𝗸 𝗶𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗶𝗱𝗱𝗹𝗲?
You made a decision and found the courage to change something.
And now you feel neither here nor there.
This is the messy middle of change.

The old way no longer feels right.
But the new direction is not yet fully clear or established.

You may know that you no longer want to automatically say yes.
But saying no still feels uncomfortable.

You may recognise that a role, relationship or routine needs to change.
But you do not yet know how, or what you want instead.

You may be clearer about what is not working.
Yet still struggle to put into words or decide what would feel right for you.

This can be a confusing and uncomfortable place to be.
There is no clear before and after.

Change is not always a clean move from one certainty to another.
There can be this middle part which typically is
a period of noticing, questioning, trying something, adjusting and learning from what happens.

This can be a natural part of change,
especially when you are working on patterns or behaviours that have been with you for some time.

At times, fear and uncertainty can feel overwhelming,
and avoiding the discomfort may seem easier than continuing.
You may begin considering returning to what is familiar.

I hear you.
The feeling of being stuck and questioning yourself can be very strong.

It may help to ask:
What is clearer or already working?
What am I beginning to see differently?
Which decision genuinely requires more information?
And where might I be hesitating to move forward or persevere because it feels uncomfortable?

These questions can help you distinguish between thoughtful consideration and remaining in a familiar pattern because the alternative feels too uncertain or uncomfortable.

𝗜𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗼𝗹𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝘀𝘄𝗲𝗿.
𝗜𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗯𝗲𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝗴𝗲𝘁 𝗰𝗹𝗲𝗮𝗿𝗲𝗿 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗮𝗿𝗲, 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗴𝗻𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝗮𝗹𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗱𝘆 𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗳𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗱𝗲𝗰𝗶𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗮𝘆 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝗻𝗲𝘅𝘁.

Which part feels harder for you?
Letting go of what is familiar, or not yet knowing what comes next?

01/09/2026

𝗖𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝗮𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝗻 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝗶𝗳𝗶𝗰 𝘀𝗶𝘁𝘂𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻.
It can also affect how you see yourself.
A role, relationship, workplace or responsibility may have shaped your routines, your decisions and the way other people relate to you.

When something changes, you may find yourself asking:
Who am I now?
Where do I fit now?
Where do I want to go from here?

You do not need to replace your old identity with a completely new one.
You can begin by noticing what still feels true, what no longer fits and what has become more important to you.

You are not starting from the beginning.
Your experience, strengths and values remain part of you.
You are exploring how you want to express them in the next chapter of your life.

🌻 What part of you still feels true, even as things change? 🌻

31/08/2026

𝐈𝐟 𝐭𝐡𝐢𝐬 𝐢𝐬 𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐲𝐨𝐮 𝐰𝐚𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐝, 𝐰𝐡𝐲 𝐝𝐨𝐞𝐬 𝐢𝐭 𝐟𝐞𝐞𝐥 𝐬𝐨 𝐮𝐧𝐜𝐨𝐦𝐟𝐨𝐫𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞?
You may have known for some time that something needed to change.
You gathered your courage and took action.
And now you are asking yourself:
“If this is what I wanted, why don’t I feel better or freer?”

Let’s have a look.
Perhaps you took the plunge and changed jobs.
You began standing up for yourself and set a boundary.
You wanted to reconnect with yourself and started making more time for yourself.
Or you stopped automatically doing what other people expected of you.

You may have believed that once you made the decision and took action, you would feel better or freer.

And in some ways, you might do.
You found the courage to act on what matters to you.
At the same time, the change may not be going as smoothly as you thought and you might feel uncertain.

You may even begin questioning whether you made the right choice.
You could feel tempted to return to the familiar pattern.
Change does not only affect the specific situation you decided to change.
It can also affect your routines, relationships, expectations and how you see yourself.

Even when a familiar pattern was no longer working for you, it still gave you reference points.
You knew what other people expected.
You knew what usually happened next.
And you knew how to respond within that pattern.
Changing it removes some of that predictability.

The uncertainty is not automatically evidence that you made the wrong choice.
But that does not mean it should be ignored.

You can become curious about it.
What about this change feels unfamiliar or uncertain?
What actually led me to choose this change in the first place?
Is there a specific concern that needs my attention?
Or am I responding to not knowing exactly what happens next?

You do not need to argue yourself out of the uncertainty.
You can give yourself enough space to review the facts, reconnect with what matters and decide how you want to respond.

Relief, hope, sadness and uncertainty can sometimes exist together.
These mixed feelings can be a natural response to what is happening within and around you.
𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐚𝐫𝐞 𝐩𝐫𝐨𝐜𝐞𝐬𝐬𝐢𝐧𝐠 𝐭𝐡𝐞 𝐦𝐨𝐯𝐞 𝐟𝐫𝐨𝐦 𝐚 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐬𝐨𝐦𝐞𝐰𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞 𝐬𝐢𝐭𝐮𝐚𝐭𝐢𝐨𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐨𝐧𝐞 𝐭𝐡𝐚𝐭 𝐢𝐬 𝐥𝐞𝐬𝐬 𝐟𝐚𝐦𝐢𝐥𝐢𝐚𝐫 𝐚𝐧𝐝 𝐩𝐫𝐞𝐝𝐢𝐜𝐭𝐚𝐛𝐥𝐞.

𝐐𝐔𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍: Have you ever questioned a change because it felt more unsettling than you expected?

28/08/2026

𝗖𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗴𝗲𝘁𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁𝗲𝗱.
Sometimes it is what develops because you started.

You trust yourself enough to take one step.
That step gives you experience.
Experience helps you develop competence.

And competence provides evidence that you can handle more than you previously believed.

The action does not need to be dramatic.
It might be:
Asking a question.
Expressing your perspective.
Trying something unfamiliar.
Making a decision without repeatedly seeking reassurance.
Or staying with a boundary even though someone else is disappointed.

𝗬𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗮𝘆 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹 𝗳𝘂𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘄𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗲 𝗱𝗼𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝘁.
𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝗲𝗮𝗰𝗵 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗲𝗻𝗴𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝘁𝗿𝘂𝘀𝘁, 𝗶𝗺𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘀𝗸𝗶𝗹𝗹𝘀 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗶𝗻𝗰𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘀𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗮𝗯𝗶𝗹𝗶𝘁𝘆 𝘁𝗼 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗻𝗱.

𝗢𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲, 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱 𝘂𝗽𝗼𝗻.

Comment 𝗖𝗢𝗡𝗙𝗜𝗗𝗘𝗡𝗖𝗘 if this is something you want to hear more about.

27/08/2026

𝗜𝘀 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘂𝗽 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝗿𝘂𝗳𝗳𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮 𝗳𝗲𝘄 𝗳𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿𝘀?
Change does not only affect you.
It can create a ripple effect for the people around you.
That ripple effect can be something beautiful.
However, some changes may create more than a ripple.
They may ruffle a few feathers.

This can happen when you begin expressing your perspective and needs more clearly.

Perhaps you have usually been the one who adjusts.
You soften your words.
You explain yourself repeatedly.
You say yes when you would prefer to say no.
You apologise when there is nothing to apologise for.
Or you remain quiet because raising the issue feels more difficult than doing it yourself.

Then one day, you respond differently.

Your response starts with:
“I cannot take that on.”
“I do not agree.”
“That does not work for me.”
Or:
“This is what I need.”

You may even follow up with an alternative suggestion or redirect because you still want to be helpful where possible.
Even so, instead of responding to what you have said, someone tells you that you are being difficult, defensive, selfish, arrogant or controlling.

That can land particularly hard when assertiveness is still unfamiliar to you.
You may immediately begin questioning yourself:
Was I too direct?
Did I go too far?

This is where it helps to understand the destinct definitions.

Assertiveness means expressing your perspective, needs or boundaries clearly.
At the same time you still respect the other person’s opinion or perspective and that they make their own choices.

Arrogance is different.
It treats your perspective as more important than theirs and may dismiss their experience because you assume that you know better.

Controlling behaviour attempts to determine what another person must do, think or feel, or tries to remove their choice.

Even with good intentions, communication can sometimes go awry.

Hence it can be good to check in:
Did I express what I needed clearly?
Was I respectful?
Did I leave the other person with their own agency?
Or was I trying to control their response or guarantee a particular outcome?

Sometimes feedback gives you useful information.
At other times, the reaction may reflect that someone is no longer receiving the automatic agreement or accommodation they had become accustomed to.

The aim is not to assume that you were right
Nor is it to immediately decide that you were wrong.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗮𝗶𝗺 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝘆 𝗴𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗲𝗱 𝗲𝗻𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝘁𝗼 𝗿𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗲𝘄 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗱 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗮𝘂𝘁𝗼𝗺𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗰𝗮𝗹𝗹𝘆 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵𝗱𝗿𝗮𝘄𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲.

Comment “𝗔𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲” if this resonates and you want to hear more.

26/08/2026

𝗔𝗿𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗺𝗶𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝘂𝗯𝘁𝗹𝗲 𝘀𝗶𝗴𝗻𝘀 𝗼𝗳 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗲?
You are working hard to strengthen your self-trust and confidence.
Yet despite your efforts, it can feel as though you are getting nowhere.
But is that the whole truth?

You may still question some of your decisions.
You may sometimes get caught up in replaying a conversation.
You may still feel uncomfortable when someone does not seem to appreciate your perspective or decision.

And because the doubt and discomfort have not completely disappeared, you may conclude that nothing has changed.

But self-trust does not always arrive as a strong feeling of confidence.
Sometimes it first appears in small changes in how you respond.

Here are three most common signs that things may already be changing and your self-trust is becoming stronger and you might have missed

𝗙𝗶𝗿𝘀𝘁:
Someone asks something of you and, instead of automatically saying yes, you pause.
You might say:
“Let me think about that.”
Or:
“I need to check what I already have on.”

That means you are beginning to include yourself in the decision.
That signals to you and to the other person that your needs and capacity matter too.

𝗦𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗱:
You begin considering what matters to you—not only what will keep other people happy or avoid disappointment.
Their needs still matter.

But they are no longer the only needs you consider or the driving factor in your decision.

You might begin to evaluate
What are my preferences?
What would I like to do? or
What brings my joy?

𝗔𝗻𝗱 𝗧𝗵𝗶𝗿𝗱:
You may still second-guess yourself after making a decision or setting a boundary.
The difference is that you do not immediately reverse it because someone shows discomfort or question it.

You give yourself time to before reacting.
You review what happened.
And if the decision still feels aligned, you back yourself and stay with it.

From the outside, these changes may appear small.
But internally, something important is happening.

You are beginning to move from automatic responses towards choices that also include your needs, preferences and perspective.

Your confidence may not have fully caught up yet.

𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝘀𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁𝘀 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗲𝘃𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗶𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗶𝘀 𝗰𝗵𝗮𝗻𝗴𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗿𝗲𝘀𝗽𝗼𝗻𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗱𝗶𝗳𝗳𝗲𝗿𝗲𝗻𝘁𝗹𝘆.

Question: What subtle change might you have missed?

25/08/2026

𝗕𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗮𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗺𝗶𝗴𝗵𝘁 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗯𝗲 𝘄𝗲𝗹𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗲 𝗯𝘆 𝗮𝗹𝗹
Especially if they are accustomed to you:
Saying yes.
Remaining quiet.
Adjusting your needs.
Avoiding disagreement.
Or taking responsibility for keeping everything running smoothly.

When you begin expressing a different perspective, saying no, asking for something or setting a boundary, the change may surprise them.

They may describe you as difficult, defensive, selfish or even arrogant.

Their discomfort does not automatically mean that something is wrong.
But neither does it mean their discomfort should be ignored completely.
It might be wise to reflect
Was I clear?
Was I respectful?
Did I express my perspective without dismissing theirs?
Did I communicate a boundary—or try to control their response?

𝗔𝘀𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗴𝘂𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗻𝘁𝗲𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗽𝗲𝗼𝗽𝗹𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗮𝗴𝗿𝗲𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗼𝗿 𝗮𝗽𝗽𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗶𝗮𝘁𝗲 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘀𝗮𝗶𝗱.

𝗜𝘁 𝗺𝗲𝗮𝗻𝘀 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘄𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗺𝗮𝘁𝘁𝗲𝗿𝘀 𝘁𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗵𝗶𝗹𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗶𝗹𝗹 𝗿𝗲𝗰𝗼𝗴𝗻𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗼𝗻 𝗵𝗮𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗶𝗿 𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝘀𝗽𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗰𝗵𝗼𝗶𝗰𝗲𝘀.

Have you ever been told that you had changed when you began speaking more clearly?

24/08/2026

“𝗝𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗯𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗻𝘁.” 𝗘𝗮𝘀𝘆, 𝗶𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝗶𝘁?
Wouldn’t it be nice if you could just flick a switch and—pronto—feel your confidence soar?
But real life is a little different.

You have something valuable to contribute in a meeting.
You have prepared for a conversation.
Or there is an opportunity you would genuinely like to pursue.

You know what matters and what you want to say.

But sometimes, when the moment comes, things go differently.
You might question whether your point matters.
You might wonder how other people will respond.
Will they take you seriously?
Will they question your expertise or experience?

And sometimes in the end, you might change what you wanted to say—or decide not to say anything after all.

Later, you may ask yourself:
Why didn’t I speak up?
Where did the confidence go that I felt just moments before?

The challenge is that confidence is not a switch you can simply turn on.

𝗦𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝘁𝗿𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗲𝗳 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝗶𝘁𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝘂𝗻𝗱𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻.

𝗦𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝘁𝗿𝘂𝘀𝘁 means being able to back yourself, speak up or respond—even when you cannot predict exactly what will happen.
𝗦𝗲𝗹𝗳-𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗲𝗳 means recognising that your voice, capabilities and potential have value.

𝗖𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗲𝘁𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲, 𝗲𝘅𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗶𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗺𝗮𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿𝘆 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝘃𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗼𝘁𝗵𝗲𝗿 𝗯𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗯𝗹𝗼𝗰𝗸𝘀.
You have the facts.
You take an action.
You learn from it.
You improve your knowledge, skills or delivery.

Through this, you collect evidence that you can handle the situation and respond to what happens.

That means the first action may not come from feeling completely confident.
It may come from trusting yourself enough to take one manageable step.
To ask the question.
Express one thought.
Apply for the opportunity.
Or begin the conversation.

That experience then gives your confidence something real to build upon.

So, instead of wondering:
“How can I be more confident?”

You might ask:
“𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗶𝘀 𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗽 𝗜 𝗰𝗮𝗻 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲?”
“𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗱𝗼 𝗜 𝗻𝗲𝗲𝗱 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝘀𝘁 𝗶𝗻 𝗺𝘆𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝗼𝗿 𝗯𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗲𝘃𝗲 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗺𝘆𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝘁𝗼 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗲 𝗶𝘁?”
𝗕𝗲𝗰𝗮𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝘁𝗮𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗽 𝗴𝗶𝘃𝗲𝘀 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗳𝗶𝗱𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝘀𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝘂𝗶𝗹𝗱 𝗼𝗻.

Question: What feels harder for you: trusting yourself or feeling confident?

22/08/2026

𝗕𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗼𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗼𝘄𝗻 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗳𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗲𝗹𝘆 𝗮𝗿𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘀𝗮𝗺𝗲 𝘁𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴!
Being on your own does not automatically mean you are lonely.
Sometimes being on your own is exactly what you need.

Time to breathe.
Time to think.
Time to do something you enjoy.
Time without having to explain yourself.
Time to recharge your energy.

For some, being on their own is OK.
It is where they come back to themselves.

Feeling lonely is different.

Because loneliness is not about whether people are physically around you.
You can also feel lonely in a group.

At work or with family.
In a friendship and even in a relationship.
You can sit next to someone and still feel emotionally far away.
You can be surrounded by people and still feel unseen.

And sometimes that kind of loneliness can feel even harder than being alone.

Because when you are physically alone, the loneliness may make sense.
There is no one there.
But when you feel lonely around others, it can create a different kind of ache.

Why do I feel this way when people are right here?
Why do I still feel unseen?
Why does it feel like I have to keep so much inside?
Why does being around people sometimes make me feel even more alone?
The last one was something that I used to think a lot.

Maybe because the issue is not the absence of people.
Maybe it is the absence of real connection.

Feeling lonely does not mean you cannot be with yourself.

It does not mean you are asking for too much.
It does not mean you have to have people around you all the time.

Sometimes loneliness is a signal.

A signal that something in you is longing for a different kind of connection.
Somewhere you do not have to hold everything together.

Maybe it is less about why you feel lonely, and more about noticing what kind of connection you are missing.
Being heard.
Support with what you are feeling.
Being understood without having to explain every layer.
Someone who can sit with you in this without trying to fix it straight away.

𝗟𝗼𝗻𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗲𝘀𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝗮𝘀𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝗺𝗽𝗮𝗻𝘆.
𝗦𝗼𝗺𝗲𝘁𝗶𝗺𝗲𝘀 𝗶𝘁’𝘀 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗵𝗮𝘃𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗿𝗲𝗮𝗹 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻.

A connection where your emotions have somewhere to go.
Where your thoughts are not too much.
Where your feelings do not have to be edited first.
Where you do not have to perform being okay.
And recognising that difference matters.

𝗕𝗲𝗰𝗮𝘂𝘀𝗲 𝗯𝗲𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝘄𝗮𝘆𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗶𝘀𝘀𝘂𝗲.
𝗙𝗲𝗲𝗹𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗱𝗶𝘀𝗰𝗼𝗻𝗻𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗲𝗱 𝗶𝘀.

𝗛𝗮𝘃𝗲 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗿 𝗳𝗲𝗹𝘁 𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗲𝗹𝘆 𝗲𝘃𝗲𝗻 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘄𝗲𝗿𝗲 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝗼𝗻𝗲?

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