30/03/2026
Disclaimer: Honesty post.
For those who don’t know, I’ve pulled out from my Season A bodybuilding competitions and have postponed til Season B. I’m still not even 100% sure if I’ll continue prep this year.
Sometimes, I’m all fire and focused and driven to succeed. But other times, I’m an emotional mess and can’t get out of bed. This year, I feel like every curveball has been thrown at me, and I’m not sure I can continue. Prep is hard as it is; but when you are essentially homeless, living in and out of your van and various friends places, travelling back and forth interstate for family occasions, including my grandmothers funeral and likely another one coming up soon… my emotional bandwidth and resilience has taken a hit. Willpower and discipline go out the window. At this point, I don’t know if I’m really cut out for bodybuilding. I don’t know how to put my emotions aside and just get the job done. I feel deeply, and things affect me deeply. Prep is isolating. And being halfway across the state from friends and family can be hard. Especially when people are dying, I’m struggling financially to get there and stress levels high. I’m grateful to those who have given me a helping hand.
Sometimes it just comes down to timing; and I obviously did not pick the right timing his year.
Working in the mines is a privilege that I am grateful for; and I love where I live in Perth now. But, it doesn’t always mean that I’m ’loaded’ as some assume. As a single home owner; there is a lot of expenses that I’ve had to sacrifice other luxuries such as travel or visiting my family back in Victoria. Throw in Air BnB and attempting to prep for an IFBB show (actually the original plan was FMG, NBA and IFBB) 😅… I guess I never did the math properly and was a little too ambitious. Now I’m questioning whether I should be in prep at all. Red flags at the end of last year that I ignored… wishing I had of paid more attention to now 😅 that have cost me far more than I could have anticipated.
Anyway. We turn a fresh page. Who knows what’s next. I’ll let you know once I know..
In the meantime, look after yourselves and your loved ones. You never know if you will see them again. 🫶
