07/08/2026
When We Realise We Don’t Have the Vocabulary for Abundance
There is an interesting stage in personal growth that we don’t talk about much. We do the inner work. We become more aware of ourselves, understand our patterns, let go of old beliefs and become less reactive. Then, somewhere along the way, we discover something surprising: we don’t actually have the vocabulary for the life we want to create.
We have become very good at talking about problems. We know words like stress, risk, failure, competition, scarcity, control and survival. We know how to identify what could go wrong. But when someone asks, “What would an abundant life look like for you?”, we sometimes struggle to answer.
It’s not necessarily because we don’t want abundance. Perhaps we simply haven’t practised imagining it.
Our mind becomes fluent in whatever we repeatedly experience. Someone who has spent years dealing with uncertainty may become extremely good at spotting risks. Someone who has experienced disappointment may become very good at protecting themselves from disappointment. These can be useful skills. They may even have helped us survive and succeed.
But the same skills can eventually become a filter through which we see everything.
We become very good at avoiding loss, but beginners at imagining possibility.
Scarcity has a surprisingly sophisticated vocabulary. “That’s not realistic.” “We don’t have enough time.” “People won’t pay that.” “I’ve tried that before.” “What if it doesn’t work?” “Let’s be practical.” Sometimes these statements are completely sensible. The problem is when they become our automatic language.
We start asking, “What can I afford?” before asking, “What do I actually want?”
We ask, “What’s possible with what I have?” rather than “What could become possible if I expanded what I have?”
Abundance doesn’t mean ignoring reality. It means not allowing today’s reality to become the boundary of tomorrow’s imagination.
This often becomes visible as we grow. Much of our early personal development is about removing things: limiting beliefs, unhealthy patterns, fear, resentment, unnecessary commitments and identities that no longer fit. That work is important. But eventually, we create space and realise we don’t know what to put into it.
That’s where abundance begins.
Not necessarily with having more, but with being able to imagine more.
We begin developing a different vocabulary: possibility, enough, generosity, play, ease, receiving, opportunity, creativity, trust, collaboration, joy, contribution and wonder.
Instead of asking, “How do I protect what I have?”, we begin asking, “What could I create?”
Instead of, “What if I fail?”, we might ask, “What might I discover?”
Instead of, “Who might take something from me?”, we can ask, “Who could I create something with?”
This doesn’t mean becoming unrealistically positive. Abundance isn’t pretending everything is wonderful when it isn’t. It is being able to hold two truths at the same time:
“This is difficult.”
and
“There are still possibilities here.”
One simple way to develop this is to start listening to our own language. When we catch ourselves saying, “I can’t,” “We don’t have,” “That’s impossible,” or “People won’t…”, we don’t need to replace it with some artificial positive statement. Instead, we can simply ask:
“What else might be true?”
That question creates space.
We can also practise asking better questions. Instead of “What’s wrong?”, ask “What’s possible?” Instead of “How do I fix this?”, ask “What is this trying to teach me?” Instead of “What am I missing?”, ask “What resources do I already have that I’m not using?”
And perhaps one of the most overlooked parts of abundance is learning to receive.
Someone gives you a compliment. Instead of saying, “Oh, it was nothing,” simply say, “Thank you.” Someone offers help. Instead of automatically saying, “I’ve got it,” try saying, “Thank you, I’d appreciate that.”
Abundance isn’t only the ability to give.
It is also the ability to receive without guilt.
Over time, we can also start collecting evidence. Notice the unexpected opportunities, the people who helped, the problems we solved, the setbacks that eventually opened another door. Our brain needs experiences, not just affirmations. Slowly, we build a new internal database that says:
“Life doesn’t always work against me. There are possibilities I cannot yet see.”
Perhaps eventually abundance becomes less about money, possessions or opportunities and more about our relationship with life.
We become less obsessed with controlling every outcome. We can give without immediately calculating what we’ll receive. We can celebrate someone else’s success without experiencing it as evidence of our own lack. We can change direction without calling the previous direction a failure.
And perhaps the deepest form of abundance is this:
Being able to imagine a future that isn’t simply a slightly improved version of our past.
So maybe the question isn’t, “How do I become more abundant?”
Maybe it’s:
“What would I imagine if I wasn’t limited to the vocabulary I’ve learned from my past?”
Sometimes the next stage of growth isn’t learning another technique.
It’s discovering that the language we use to describe our lives can quietly become the boundary of the life we believe is possible.✌️
