14/06/2026
Round 6 – Blackwood Axemen Masters vs Athelstone AFL Masters
Goals: Nappies 2, Cheese 2, Daz 2, Bails 2, Pacey 1, Chile 1, Belly 1, Coops 1
After the biblical rain that hammered Adelaide on Saturday, the footy gods finally smiled on the Axemen. Hewitt Oval turned on a beauty, sunshine, no wind, perfect conditions. Not a cloud in sight and not a puddle to be found. Perfect…except for our boundary lines that were washed away but we managed
Numbers were solid despite plenty finding p**s poor reasons not to play. Some cited commitments, others cited family obligations, and some perhaps a distinct lack of courage may have been involved. One of the omissions was The King who was spotted on the boundary line wearing dark sunglasses and looking about as fresh as a week-old pie. Reports suggest he’d been on the turps at a local function the night before and was definitely looking second hand. But having said that still could have packed the boots, poor form.
Meanwhile fellow Axeman Peachy was seen about 12pm trudging on foot up the steep Ackland Hill Road, in the opposite direction to Hewitt Oval, sweating bullets, looking like a man heading to his own ex*****on. Apparently heading to the same venue mentioned above to conduct a forensic clean-up and autopsy on whatever chunky carnage he left on the driveway.
In one of the more remarkable stats seen in Masters footy, the Raggies arrived with just 25 players. Yes, total. Not 25 on the bench. Twenty-five human beings altogether. Unheard of. We were anticipating a second shift to show up at half time!.
After an ordinary showing on our home deck a fortnight ago, the Axemen responded beautifully. The ball movement was clean, precise and purposeful, working the footy around the tiny confines of Hewitt Oval far better than previous weeks. The switch was on, the overlap run was there, almost looked like a professional unit! Almost.
One of the finest individual performances ever witnessed in Masters football came courtesy of Pacey and took home the Blackwood Intersport award. Stationed across half back, he vacuumed up everything that came near him. Running, carrying, intercepting and delivering the footy with class. Conservatively he had 40-plus touches, though some witnesses are claiming numbers that estimate a bit light. Perhaps being his wedding anniversary may have played a role. Maybe a bit lighter on his toes after the annual release of built-up pressure but whatever the reason, he was absolutely brilliant and committed!
The Silk returned after a month on the sidelines following a knee clean-out and immediately resumed normal programming. Broadway Hotel award went his way. Simmo on the wing was back to his brilliant best. In a rare development proving he is in fact human, he committed two mistakes during the afternoon. Historians are still investigating, with early records suggesting the last occurrence was sometime in 1987.
Big Coops continued his sparkling start to Axemen life in just his second game. Dominating centre half forward and providing a huge presence in the ruck, he presented all day and capped off another strong performance with a well-earned sausage roll.
This week’s Men of earth / chocolate award goes to club stalwart Brooksy. Due to other commitments he hasn’t been around much this season, but today he certainly made his presence felt. Gathering a loose ball at the top of the goal square Brooka snapped at goal and somehow missed sideways by approximately 40 metres. The ball sailed into the nearby playground, taking out three unsuspecting kids in the process. An extraordinary effort considering Brooka’s maximum kicking distance is generally accepted to be about 30 metres.
Off the field the BBQ was again firing on all cylinders, kicking into gear early to feed the round-ball kids before backing up for the Axemen faithful. A massive thanks to the James clan, Lolly, Zander and Rory, who did a cracking job on the tongs all day and kept the masses well fed.
As always, training is on Tuesday night at 6:30pm.
Stick around for a beer afterwards because those three beers will be the tastiest six beers you’ll have all week.
Well done legends
AFL Masters National
AFL Masters SA
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