20/07/2021
Navigating the digital world can be tricky with our kids, especially with so many parents home-schooling or in lockdown.
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MYTH: Eighth grade is the best age for a smartphone. Teens need social media because that is where all of their friends are and they will be social outcasts if they don’t have it.
FACT: In 2018 at the Digital Media and Developing Minds Congress, research was discussed regarding social media use in eighth graders. Studies show that mid-adolescence, specifically eighth grade, is a time of heightened vulnerability to risky and reckless behavior. Part of the reason for this is the increase in reward-seeking behavior fueled by the remodeling of the brain during this stage of brain development.
For example, in sixth grade, top Internet searches centered around the subject of animals, but in 8th grade, top searches were depression and relationships. When asked if they had ever made rude or mean comments in texts, 36% of 6th graders said they had. That increased to 45% in 7th graders and even more in 8th graders with 54% (more than half) saying they had sent mean texts. When asked if they had ever uploaded embarrassing photos of a friend, 6th graders came in at 7% while 8th graders were a staggering 35%.
The more time a teen spends on social media and games, the more time they are spending with their peers. With 24/7 online access your teen never really “comes home.” Studies confirm that peer-oriented kids do worse in all areas of life than parent-oriented kids. Teens are not equipped to lead teens like adults are supposed to. Teens need parents as their guide. When family attachment is stronger than peer attachment, teens have a healthier social life.
Social media doesn’t make stronger friendships. Tethered to their smartphones 24/7, teens admit to loving their phones more than their friends. Teens now perfer to go to their rooms so they can hang out on their phones in privacy. But are they really socializing or are they just becoming more lonely and depressed? Research says the latter. A 13-year-old girl explains to Twenge, “We didn’t have a choice to know any life without iPads or iPhones. I think we like our phones more than we like actual people.”
SOLUTION: More is not better when it comes to friends. Encourage your teen to build a few solid friendships rather than 400 shallow friends. Have their friends over to spend in-person, non-tech time with them. Get to know their friends and their friends’ parents. Teach your teen how to have a relationship by spending non-tech time with friends. Create family rituals, traditions and plenty of family time to enrich family connections and healthy friendships will follow.
Read more about solutions here: www.screenstrong.com/product/challenge
