11/09/2023
This was moments after a tough defeat for one my athletes at the Youth Worlds in Rome in 2019.
If you're testing yourself at the right level, there will be losses amongst the wins. It's part of growing and levelling up. The important thing is how you react to those losses.
As a coach, I have learned that athletes themselves are usually in a tailspin in the moments after a loss and while I could start doing a post mortem on the fight there and then, it's neither helpful nor productive. I use this time to be proactive.
Firstly, give the athlete a hug and tell them I'm proud of them. No other information is necessary right now.
Next, I make a point of congratulating their opponent and opponent's coaches. It's thanks to the opponents that we've had the motivation to work hard for this challenge and for that, we should always be grateful.
Then I give my athlete space to decompress. In this situation, Fou Fou's brother Abanoub was there to comfort him so I know he'll be fine. I will catch up with him when emotions subside. I find about 20-30 minutes is adequate and then the rebuild can begin.
The rebuild is about firstly highlighting the things the athlete did right during the contest. At this point, they can only remember the result and the mistakes, regardless of how well they fought up to that point. I remind them of the gains we made during training camp to get here and the good shots they landed in the bout. Then I point out the critical errors that I noticed and most importantly a plan for how to fix it for next time.
No matter what the result, I want my athlete leaving the venue knowing 3 things:
1. I'm proud of them, no matter what.
2. Whatever the mistake, it's fixable
3. Today, we grew because we tested ourselves against tough opposition. A loss is only a loss, if you don't learn from it.
In all sports, wins and losses are just part of the process. A pound of metal or a statistic is not the be all and end all. Becoming the very best version of yourself over the duration of your span on Earth is the ultimate prize. Confidence, Pride, Health and Vitality are prizes too. Once you challenge yourself and work hard, you're always winning.