Coaching for people who feel like outsiders

Coaching for people who feel like outsiders I'm an online coach helping English speaking adults all over the world. I specialise in kink and neurodivergence.

Coaching website is www.johnpendal.com ... other sites: linktr.ee/JohnPendal Accredited coach with Animas Centre for Coaching
FAA Level 2 Award in First Aid for Mental Health
FAA Level 3 Award in Supervising First Aid for Mental Health
Associate coach with Thriving Autistic
Member of the International Coaching Federation

10/09/2026

๐’๐ฉ๐š๐ญ๐ข๐š๐ฅ ๐€๐ฐ๐š๐ซ๐ž๐ง๐ž๐ฌ๐ฌ

I've always felt shame about my poor spatial awareness, until I found out that autistic folk are more likely to struggle with proprioception: your body's ability to sense its own position, movement, and location in space without having to look.

๐€๐ฎ๐ญ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฆ/ ๐€๐ƒ๐‡๐ƒ ๐ซ๐ž๐ฌ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ๐œ๐ž๐ฌ ๐›๐ฒ ๐๐ž๐จ๐ฉ๐ฅ๐ž ๐จ๐Ÿ ๐†๐ฅ๐จ๐›๐š๐ฅ ๐Œ๐š๐ฃ๐จ๐ซ๐ข๐ญ๐ฒThe following links and resources have been kindly shared by other pe...
07/09/2026

๐€๐ฎ๐ญ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฆ/ ๐€๐ƒ๐‡๐ƒ ๐ซ๐ž๐ฌ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ๐œ๐ž๐ฌ ๐›๐ฒ ๐๐ž๐จ๐ฉ๐ฅ๐ž ๐จ๐Ÿ ๐†๐ฅ๐จ๐›๐š๐ฅ ๐Œ๐š๐ฃ๐จ๐ซ๐ข๐ญ๐ฒ

The following links and resources have been kindly shared by other people:


๐Ž๐‘๐†๐€๐๐ˆ๐’๐€๐“๐ˆ๐Ž๐๐’
Autism In Black is a neurodivergent-led organisation uniquely dedicated to serving the Black autistic community: https://www.autisminblack.org/

The Autistic Women & Nonbinary Network (AWN) provides community support, and resources for Autistic women, girls, transfeminine and transmasculine nonbinary people, trans people of all genders, Two Spirit people, and all people of marginalised genders or of no gender. AWN is committed to recognising and celebrating diversity and the many intersectional experiences in the community: https://awnnetwork.org/

The Autistic People of Color Fund (USA only) provides direct financial support to autistic people of color through individual microgrants between $100 to $500: https://autismandrace.com/autistic-people-of-color-fund/

The Color of Autism Foundation is a US based Neuro-Affirming Non-Profit organisation, committed to fostering inclusivity and support for African American families navigating the world of autism: https://thecolorofautism.org/

National Q***r & Trans Therapists of Color Network (USA): https://nqttcn.com/

Scottish Ethnic Minority Autistics is a catalyst for racialised Autistic People in Scotland to illuminate, educate, positively disrupt and have power over their own futures: https://sema.scot/


๐€๐ƒ๐•๐Ž๐‚๐€๐“๐„๐’
Dr Destiny Huff has written the book "Neuroaffirming Advocacy: A Neuroaffirming Guide to Special Education Services" and also organises a virtual event: The Black ADHD Experience Conference: https://www.destinyhuffconsulting.com/theblackadhdexperienceconference

Myira Khan is Muslim and ADHD. She has a blog at https://www.myirakhancounselling.co.uk/blog and has also written the book โ€œThe Muslim Guide to Wellbeing": https://www.myirakhancounselling.co.uk/the-muslim-guide-to-wellbeing


๐Ž๐๐‹๐ˆ๐๐„ ๐‚๐Ž๐Œ๐Œ๐”๐๐ˆ๐“๐˜ ๐†๐‘๐Ž๐”๐๐’
Black Autistic Meetup is a group for Black Autistic folks to meet and connect with others. It is a space for belonging, representation, support and hope: https://ndconnection.co.uk/black-autistic-meetup

ADHD Babes is a support group for Black women and Black non-binary people of African-Caribbean descent with ADHD: https://www.adhdbabes.com/ and https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/o/adhd-babes-31447883953


๐Ž๐๐‹๐ˆ๐๐„ ๐‘๐„๐’๐Ž๐”๐‘๐‚๐„๐’
Articles by Lovette Jallow, an author, intersectional strategist, and human rights advocate based in Sweden: https://lovettejallow.substack.com/ - including Neurodivergence in Ancient Africa: What History Forgot but Our Ancestors Knew.

Autism in Black is the YouTube channel for Maria Davis-Pierre, dedicated to bringing awareness to Autism in the black community: https://www.youtube.com//

Autistic While Black in the UK: Masking, Codeswitching, and Other (Non)fictions (Estimated Reading Time: 90-150 mins): https://neuroclastic.com/long-read-autistic-while-black-in-the-uk-masking-codeswitching-and-other-nonfictions/

Salon talks to Morรฉnike Giwa-Onaiwu of the Autism Women's Network about race, gender and the spectrum (Interview transcript and audio file): https://www.salon.com/2017/03/15/listen-black-female-and-autistic-hiding-in-plain-sight/

That Life. If you identify as autistic and Black, Latinx, South Asian, Asian, Pacific Islander, Indigenous, Middle Eastern, North African, or any other racial and/or ethnic minority, you are not invisible: https://www.autastic.com/that-autisticbipoc-life/


๐๐Ž๐ƒ๐‚๐€๐’๐“๐’
Q***r! AuDHD! BIPOC! Podcast - "where we talk about our autistic and ADHD journeys, living in multiple margins, our challenges, our joys, and what we want other q***r AuDHD BIPOC and the world to know about us."
https://www.rewilding.cc/qab and https://www.instagram.com/q***raudhdbipoc


๐’๐”๐†๐†๐„๐’๐“๐„๐ƒ ๐‡๐€๐’๐‡๐“๐€๐†๐’










๐…๐€๐‚๐„๐๐Ž๐Ž๐Š ๐†๐‘๐Ž๐”๐
Black Autistics: https://www.facebook.com/groups/blackautistics


๐”๐๐ˆ๐•๐„๐‘๐’๐ˆ๐“๐˜ ๐๐€๐๐„๐‘๐’
Is neurodiversity a Global Northern White paradigm?:https://centaur.reading.ac.uk/121596/9/nair-et-al-2024-is-neurodiversity-a-global-northern-white-paradigm.pdf


๐‹๐ˆ๐’๐“๐’ ๐Ž๐… ๐…๐”๐‘๐“๐‡๐„๐‘ ๐‘๐„๐’๐Ž๐”๐‘๐‚๐„๐’
https://autismandrace.com/resources/
https://www.facebook.com/AutisticTyping/posts/455214035079000
https://thepunkrockautistic.com/the-punk-rock-autistic-resources/


I hope that helps. Please send me a message if there are other resources youโ€™d like me to add.

Best wishes, John

(Image by Clay Banks)

๐€๐ƒ๐‡๐ƒ ๐š๐ง๐ ๐€๐ฎ๐ƒ๐‡๐ƒ ๐‘๐ž๐ฌ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ๐œ๐ž๐ฌHere are some resources that ADHD or AuDHD (both Autistic and ADHD) clients and practitioners ha...
28/08/2026

๐€๐ƒ๐‡๐ƒ ๐š๐ง๐ ๐€๐ฎ๐ƒ๐‡๐ƒ ๐‘๐ž๐ฌ๐จ๐ฎ๐ซ๐œ๐ž๐ฌ

Here are some resources that ADHD or AuDHD (both Autistic and ADHD) clients and practitioners have shared with me. This isnโ€™t a complete list, itโ€™s just a start. Iโ€™ll be adding to it as I hear more recommendations.

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๐€๐ฎ๐ƒ๐‡๐ƒ ๐€๐๐ƒ ๐€๐ƒ๐‡๐ƒ ๐Ž๐๐‹๐ˆ๐๐„ ๐€๐‘๐“๐ˆ๐‚๐‹๐„๐’
Teo Byrne of NDWise Hub has written about "AuDHD as a synchronous symbiotic relationship" at https://ndwisehub.substack.com/p/audhd-as-a-synchronous-symbiotic

Jade Farrington has written an article โ€œIs the AuDHD mind at war with itself? Replacing the narrative of conflict with a single monotropic neurologyโ€ at https://jadefarrington.substack.com/p/is-the-audhd-mind-at-war-with-itself

Dr Neff has a series of infographics about how ADHD overlaps with other conditions at https://neurodivergentinsights.com/adhd-infographics/

How Embracing the Chaos Helps My ADHD: https://www.verywellmind.com/how-embracing-chaos-helps-adhd-6822021

โ€œAm I Going to Get Fired?โ€ Self-Accommodations for ADHD Hazards at Work: https://www.additudemag.com/am-i-going-to-get-fired-adhd-hazards-at-work/

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๐๐Ž๐Ž๐Š๐’
Unmasked: The Ultimate Guide to ADHD, Autism and Neurodivergence by Ellie Middleton, who is both Autistic and ADHD (AuDHD)

"An Autistic and ADHD Journey, re-writing a New Identity Post-Discovery" by Rachel Winder: https://livedplacespublishing.com/book/isbn/9781918026955

Extra Focus: The Quick Start Guide to Adult ADHD by Jesse J. Anderson

The Anti-Planner Book (How to Get Sh*t Done When You Don't Feel Like It) by Dani Donovan: https://anti-planner.com/

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๐˜๐Ž๐”๐“๐”๐๐„
Autistic youtuber "Yo Samdy Sam" has a videos about being Autistic and ADHD: https://www.youtube.com/

Psychology professor Dr Inna is on YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/ - including her watching and reacting to the Channel 4 documentary "The Great ADHD Myth"

TEDx talk on ADHD in Girls and Women: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ybk2IzwV6Zg

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๐ˆ๐๐’๐“๐€๐†๐‘๐€๐Œ
Sonny Jane Wise Instagram account - lots of affirming ADHD content: https://www.instagram.com/livedexperienceeducator/

https://www.instagram.com/adhdjesse/

https://www.instagram.com/neurodivergent_insights/

https://www.instagram.com/neuro_DiverS/

https://www.instagram.com/adhd_love_/

https://www.instagram.com/_dr_inna/

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๐‚๐Ž๐Œ๐Œ๐”๐๐ˆ๐“๐˜ ๐†๐‘๐Ž๐”๐๐’
ADHD Babes: A support group for Black women and Black non-binary people of African-Caribbean descent with ADHD. https://www.adhdbabes.com/ and https://www.eventbrite.co.uk/o/adhd-babes-31447883953

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๐๐Ž๐ƒ๐‚๐€๐’๐“๐’
ADHD chatter podcast: https://www.instagram.com/adhd_chatter_podcast/
Including a 30 second Instagram video explaining ADHD overwhelm: https://www.instagram.com/reel/C5_EAFdM9s2/?igsh=MTZnNzM5eTEyNXQ0

Neurodivergent Moments Podcast by comedians Abigoliah Schamaun (ADHD) and Joe Wells (Autistic): https://shows.acast.com/neurodivergent-moments

Q***r! AuDHD! BIPOC! Podcast: https://www.rewilding.cc/qab and https://www.instagram.com/q***raudhdbipoc

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๐€๐๐๐’
DUBBII APP โ€“ Body doubling videos to help you focus: https://www.dubbii.app/

INFLOW APP - claims to help you manage ADHD: https://www.getinflow.io/

SWEEPY APP - https://sweepy.app/ - turns household chores into a game

VARIOUS ADHD SUPPORT APPS by Neuro Motion: https://neuronotionn.gumroad.com/ e.g. Task Managers, Habit and Routine trackers, Journal and Mood logger.

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๐‡๐Ž๐‘๐Œ๐Ž๐๐„๐’ ๐€๐๐ƒ ๐€๐ƒ๐‡๐ƒ
https://www.additudemag.com/women-hormones-and-adhd/

https://www.balance-menopause.com/menopause-library/menopause-and-adhd/

----

๐๐„๐ˆ๐๐† ๐ˆ๐ ๐€ ๐‘๐„๐‹๐€๐“๐ˆ๐Ž๐๐’๐‡๐ˆ๐
ADHD and Relationships: https://theautismservice.co.uk/learn/adhd-and-relationships/

Communication Tips for Neurodiverse Couples: https://adhdandautismclinic.co.uk/communication-tips-for-neurodiverse-couples/

Please let me know if you have any questions or suggestions youโ€™d like to add.

Best wishes, John

18/08/2026

I'll be teaching an online class on "Autism and Kink" Sunday 13th Sept. (It also touches on some other forms of neurodivergence like ADHD and alexithymia.) We'll look at why the kink community is so attractive to autistic folk, and also some accommodations to try if you're playing with a neurodivergent person. Ticket link at https://linktr.ee/JohnPendal

๐Ž๐ง๐ฅ๐ข๐ง๐ž ๐œ๐ฅ๐š๐ฌ๐ฌ: "๐€๐ฎ๐ญ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐š๐ง๐ ๐Š๐ข๐ง๐ค" ๐’๐ฎ๐ง ๐Ÿ๐Ÿ‘ ๐’๐ž๐ฉ๐ญI'm going to be presenting my most popular workshop: "Autism and Kink", onlin...
10/08/2026

๐Ž๐ง๐ฅ๐ข๐ง๐ž ๐œ๐ฅ๐š๐ฌ๐ฌ: "๐€๐ฎ๐ญ๐ข๐ฌ๐ฆ ๐š๐ง๐ ๐Š๐ข๐ง๐ค" ๐’๐ฎ๐ง ๐Ÿ๐Ÿ‘ ๐’๐ž๐ฉ๐ญ

I'm going to be presenting my most popular workshop: "Autism and Kink", online with Wicked Grounds on Sunday 13th September from 11am-1pm PDT/ 2pm-4pm EDT/ 7pm-9pm Ireland & UK time.

Although it's most centred around autism, we will be including a few other forms of neurodivergence like ADHD, AuDHD and Alexithymia (not being able to name your feelings.)

The class covers:

- What is the difference between autism and neurodivergence?
- What's the right language to use?
- What are some of the differences between autistic and neurotypical communication?
- Why are kink environments so attractive to autistic folk?
- Why are Munches so difficult, and what can we do to improve the experience?
- How can we adapt kink play for neurodivergent play partners?
- Why might autistic people be more likely to stay in a relationship that's not a good fit?

There's a handout available that you can use to read along or download for later.

Tickets on a sliding scale from https://forbiddentickets.com/events/wicked-grounds/e11af4f11b

Please let me know if you have any questions x

04/08/2026

Last week I posted a reel sharing some of my thoughts why autistic people might drink alcohol in social situations. Someone commented that what I was describing was the disease of alcoholism, and I was blaming autism and using it as an excuse for my behaviour. I've thought about that a lot over the last week. It's a useful question. If you'd like to take the test I did, it's at https://www.drinkaware.co.uk/tools/drinking-check

29/07/2026

Some thoughts on why autistic people might drink alcohol.

20/07/2026

Trying to answer "what is autism?"

14/07/2026

This year I've heard politicians from both left and ring wing parties say that autism assessments are out of control and putting pressure on our health services. This is my response.

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