20/04/2025
Part 3: My Mindset and Resilience
Coaching and management have some of the hardest jobs out there. Unless you’ve been in their shoes, making the tough decisions they’ve had to make, you’ll never truly understand…
So imagine this: I’m smashing my extras… with no car, just a bike. I’m cycling to all these faraway places—and yes, before I got my car, I was the “lift man.” Always asking, “Please, can I get a lift?” Some of you know how it goes.
I’ve been playing for some decent teams around Bournemouth, but the common theme has always been game time. I’ll find the video—it’s on my Instagram. There was a fitness test… guess who was smoking everyone there? ME.
Saturday comes around and I’m asking myself, “Why am I not starting?” No real explanation. Back then, I couldn’t see it, but now I do. It’s not just about what you do on the ball—it’s all the other aspects of your game. I used to be quiet and only come alive when the ball was near me.
Lesson learnt.
Getting released isn’t great either. Imagine scoring on your debut, and then getting released after pre-season… it’s crazy.
The trial process for Poole Town Reserves was mad lol. Imagine—five trials and a whole bag of players turning up. Everyone was on that “I’ll chat to you when I need to” vibe. I was just like, “More time, I probably won’t make it, but let’s see what happens.”
So the last trial day comes, and if your name gets called, you’re unsuccessful. Mad, I know.
Imagine—I’m hearing a load of “J…” James… then Jake… so now I’m sweating 🤣.
But my name never got called. I was gassed.
You know what got me through? My attitude and work rate. It didn’t work out in the end, but imagine if I didn’t try. I wouldn’t have learnt that important lesson.
Then came Verwood Town FC. That team had ballers.
I wasn’t expecting to get through and play either, but again, I showed up and did what I could to stay there.
I got my chance against Petersfield—some faraway game. Got a lift and thought, “If I don’t play, this journey home is going to be long…” Ended up playing 45 minutes and got praise from the gaffer. But a few games later, it wasn’t meant to be.
There were players who had been in that league and part of that team for a while, so it became a case of “who you know.” Frustrating? Yes. But what can you do apart from control what’s controllable?
One of my managers said to me:
“Forget the ball rolls and flicks round the corner. You’re not a footballer—you’re an athlete.”
I thought, “Nah, he’s violating me…” but when he told me again in training, I decided to actually take it in.
He said:
“You’re a powerful runner. When you get going, not many people want to be in your way. Use what you’re good at and fine-tune that.”
I’m grateful for every lesson I’ve learned on this journey. I’m living proof that your mindset and work rate will take you places you feel you don’t belong—but guess what? You do. 🤝❗️
