The Innerchild Healing Expert

The Innerchild Healing Expert I support mothers to become the conscious parents and connected partners they want to be through healing their inner child Hi!

My name is Lavinia Brown and I'm a psychodynamic coach that supports mothers to heal their inner child, integrate their past, stop history repeating itself and become the mothers THEY want to be (not who society or their families tell them they 'should' be)!

If su***de is the leading cause of death in men under 35 then perhaps it’s not just that men aren’t equipped or strong e...
10/06/2026

If su***de is the leading cause of death in men under 35 then perhaps it’s not just that men aren’t equipped or strong enough to reach out when they need help but it’s also that the mental health industry itself doesn’t meet their needs when they do. ⁠
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Seeing as feminine ‘energy’ (held by both men and women but more dominantly in most women) is RELATIONAL, it could be argued that both reaching out to others and talking about what is behind the need to reach out comes more naturally to women. ⁠
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Masculine ‘energy’, on the other hand (held by both men and women but more dominantly in most men) is more SINGULAR. So it could therefore equally be argued that talking about things doesn’t come quite so naturally to men and doesn’t serve the same purpose. ⁠
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Which, given that so many healing modalities involve talking, implies that when and if men do eventually reach out for support, there aren’t enough accessible modalities for them to explore and heal what is going on for them that don’t involve talking. ⁠
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What are your thoughts on this? Do the men in your life like talking out their issues or challenges, and if not, what do they turn to, if anything, to process them and heal? ⁠
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🎙️ To tune into the latest episode of Becoming Untriggered Podcast - Why Men Avoid Therapy & Emotional Healing In Relationships on Apple, Spotify and Youtube...

08/06/2026

There is no doubt that when you call to mind what is going well in your life, what makes you happy, who you love and who loves you, and count whatever you see as blessings in your life, your appreciation for the present moment greatly increases and you feel a growing sense of inner peace and overall wellbeing.

This is how practising gratitude can bring joy into your every day, and comfort when things feel challenging.

But gratitude can also get misconstrued.

For example:

➡️ when it is accompanied by a sense of shame - for what you have that others don’t
➡️ when it is accompanied by a feeling of needing to be humble about what is going well for you
➡️ when you feel you need to belittle yourself or your joy to lessen the gap between you and those who are less ‘fortunate’
➡️ when gratitude signifies the opposite to you of coming across as ‘bratty’ or ‘entitled’

…then, it might be time to explore whether it is no longer a VALUE by which you are trying to live your life, and has instead become a WOUND that is causing pain…

⁠Here are some of the ways in which you can work with me when you are ready: online, self-led foundational course (Finding Freedom); online supported programme alongside twice-monthly group coaching calls (Making Peace With Your Past), or one-to-one guidance (Private Client work) ♥️

No-one else can MAKE you feel unworthy (or anything else for that matter). ⁠⁠They can only reflect back to you what you ...
02/06/2026

No-one else can MAKE you feel unworthy (or anything else for that matter). ⁠
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They can only reflect back to you what you already think about yourself.⁠
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So if someone (including a child, partner, friend, family member or colleague) is acting in an objectively unkind or disrespectful way, and you already don’t feel loveable, worthy or enough, this behaviour is going to CONFIRM these self-limiting beliefs about yourself. ⁠
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(The brain looks to hard wire circuitry in order to be more efficient, not undo existing connections).⁠
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But if you already DO feel loveable, worthy and enough, this behaviour is not even going to touch the sides and will flow off you like water off a duck’s back. ⁠
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You won’t care what anyone else thinks, does or how anyone else chooses to channel their own stuff into their behaviour because it literally has nothing to do with you. ⁠
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Which leaves you in the best position ever to lay rational, healthy boundaries when necessary, attempt to course correct the dynamic or exit the relationship. ⁠
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When you feel sovereign, you can act powerfully - refusing to engage with anyone that can’t yet embody the same values and self-love that you do. ⁠
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This is the gift of inner work - however challenging your childhood, you CAN create a secure, loving relationship with yourself.⁠
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⁠Here are some of the ways in which you can work with me when you are ready: online, self-led foundational course (Finding Freedom); online supported programme alongside twice-monthly group coaching calls (Making Peace With Your Past), or one-to-one guidance (Private Client work) ♥️

Both men and women are made up of a blend of masculine and feminine energy traits. ⁠⁠The feminine is more relational, in...
27/05/2026

Both men and women are made up of a blend of masculine and feminine energy traits. ⁠
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The feminine is more relational, intuitive, equal, co-creative. The masculine is more singular, logical, hierarchical, individual.⁠
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It makes sense then that women - many of whom have a strong feminine energy component (generalising hugely of course) - therefore find it easier to reach out to others for support, to talk about their emotions and issues with someone else, and to not feel like this is a sign of weakness. ⁠
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Men however - many of whom have a strong masculine energy component (again, generalising hugely) - find this hard. Reaching out is often seen as a sign of weakness; asking for help equally so. ⁠
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This presents a problem for men and for society as a whole when stats show us that 80% of all su***des are men, and that su***de is the leading course of death for men under the age of 35. ⁠
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I’m interested if your own experience of men and women fallen in line with this? ⁠
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🎙️ To explore this topic in more depth (and discover the effects this has on relationships and family dynamics) tune into Why Men Avoid Therapy on Becoming Untriggered podcast - available on Apple, Spotify and Youtube.

You can read all of the parenting books and listen to all the parenting podcasts you like, absorbing all the external wi...
25/05/2026

You can read all of the parenting books and listen to all the parenting podcasts you like, absorbing all the external wisdom you feel is going to guide you into the mama you want to be...⁠
⁠..but it is ONLY doing the work of acknowledging the gap between what you needed emotionally and what your parents were able to deliver and the effect that this had on you...⁠
⁠..that will produce the change in behaviour you want to see. ⁠
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And that’s because it’s the pre-frontal cortex that holds all of the knowledge you are trying to acquire. And it’s this part that deals with logic, reasoning, the consequences of your actions and response flexibility. ⁠
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But when this part of your brain is hijacked by the part that holds repressed emotions stored in memories that have not yet been fully processed, neither response flexibility nor the knowledge it would draw upon are available to you. Because it is OFF LINE. ⁠
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So don’t blame yourself, mama, for not being able to carry through with what you know you are meant to be doing in theory. ⁠
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Because if, in practise, none of that knoweledge is accessible, your only option is to react as you felt when your parents first behaved in ways that your children are reminding you of in the present. ⁠
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In other words, your past and present are one and the same UNTIL you do the innerwork to process it. ⁠
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(And I’m here to support you to do that ❤️).

Yes of course, it’s a huge generalisation. But I don’t think many women in a heterosexual relationship would disagree th...
22/05/2026

Yes of course, it’s a huge generalisation.

But I don’t think many women in a heterosexual relationship would disagree that they are the more proactive parent of the two.

Women tend to carry the mental load of the family set up, perhaps because, whether they work outside the home as well or not, they are also usually the CEOs of the house.

And that mental load includes noticing what needs updating, streamlining or tending to.

Including their own mental health and that of family members.

Which means that women - who often see the potential best outcome in everything - are PROactive in seeking support to be the best version of themselves and seeking the support they need to do that.

Whereas men, on the other hand, tend neither to be that proactive nor to seek support.

Do you agree??

🎙️ To find out more about why this might be the case, tune into our latest podcast episode: Why Men Avoid Therapy (available on YouTube, Spotify and Apple Podcasts).

You have NEVER not known your biological mother’s energy. ⁠⁠You were even a part of her when she was a baby in her own m...
18/05/2026

You have NEVER not known your biological mother’s energy. ⁠
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You were even a part of her when she was a baby in her own mother’s womb. ⁠
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Which is why healing the (biological) mother imprint, for those who knew their mothers, can feel so very challenging - it involves literally disentangling your individual essence from the hormones, stress and feelings not only experienced in utero but also those of the egg that conceived you and the woman who birthed you.
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It’s also why the release, when you do heal it, is so huge. ⁠
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Emotionally and spiritually (if not fully physically) you are no longer part of her but sovereign in your own right. ⁠
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You can be your own person with your own beliefs, you can nurture yourself from within, and you can create the life that is in alignment with who you want to be, not influenced by anyone else’s fears, prejudices or limitations. ⁠
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Your mother left an enormous imprint on you. ⁠
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But to be the mama, partner and woman you want to be, it is essential that you clear this imprint and evolve beyond it. ⁠

(For those clients who were adopted at birth or whose biological mother wasn’t around, the mother imprint focuses also on the mother “figure(s)” in your life).
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Here are some of the ways in which you can work with me when you are ready: online, self-led foundational course (Finding Freedom); online supported programme alongside twice-monthly group coaching calls (Making Peace With Your Past) or one-to-one guidance (Private Client work). See link in bio for deets ♥️

15/05/2026

Women are often taught that asking for support is normal. We talk, we share, we seek guidance, we lean on connection.

But so many men are conditioned to believe they should already know the answer, handle it alone, or fix themselves without help. And that belief quietly creates distance in relationships, emotional disconnection, and so much unnecessary suffering.

In Episode 35 of Becoming Untriggered, we explore why men avoid therapy, why asking for help can feel like weakness to the masculine psyche, and how these patterns affect relationships, family dynamics, emotional intimacy, and mental health.

If you’ve ever felt frustrated because your partner won’t open up, refuses support, or keeps saying “I’m fine” while clearly struggling underneath, this episode will help you understand what’s really happening beneath the surface.

And if you’re a man reading this, maybe the strongest thing you can do isn’t handling it all alone.

➡️ watch more here: https://open.spotify.com/episode/4hIGPpAzY5tCaz1TuUjUlH?si=TuGZpVOYQfyQRV7LgsnhCA ♥️

The Innerchild Healing Expert

Self-sabotage is part of the wounded inner child’s play book. ⁠⁠It keeps her in safe and familiar emotional territory - ...
11/05/2026

Self-sabotage is part of the wounded inner child’s play book. ⁠
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It keeps her in safe and familiar emotional territory - one that she knows well and therefore feels comfortable in because it’s what she knows best. She grew up there. ⁠
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And when she strays out of here, to experiences or connections that feel less wounded, self-sabotage brings her back home. ⁠
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Because, contrary to what you might think, the inner child prefers what is familiar, however challenging, because it’s not unpredictable. ⁠
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She’s recognises herself in the ways she keeps herself small - she’s used to feeling unsafe and therefore always on hyper alert. ⁠
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So what is the key to feeling confident enough to leave this self-sabotaging hideout? ⁠
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It’s to gently, slowly rewire those connections so that the limiting self-beliefs she learnt in childhood and adolescence are replaced by empowering ones. ⁠
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It’s all about reparenting - learning to receive love in ways she may not yet have experienced. So that she can grow and heal from within and rightfully take up space again, feeling loveable, worthy, safe and confident. ⁠
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⁠Here are some of the ways in which you can work with me when you are ready: online, self-led foundational course (Finding Freedom); online supported programme alongside twice-monthly group coaching calls (Making Peace With Your Past), or one-to-one guidance (Private Client work) ♥️

The narcissist is an altogether different kind of beast (figuratively speaking). And therefore requires an altogether di...
07/05/2026

The narcissist is an altogether different kind of beast (figuratively speaking). And therefore requires an altogether different kind of handling. ⁠
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What works with ‘normal’ people doesn’t work with them. Because they interpret all behaviour through the lens of energetic potential. ⁠
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The more emotionally you react to them, the more energy you offer them. ⁠
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And since they feed off energy from other people (they themselves are perpetually empty, unable to generate their own inner fuel), their sole (perhaps unconscious) quest is to secure the source of their next intake. ⁠
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Which means that your sole focus (as someone who does generate their own inner fuel through connecting and loving others) needs to be to limit or cut off their fuel source altogether (if that source is you).
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But beware - laying boundaries with a narcissist won’t work - they see this as a form of engagement, off which they will feed.

Because the energy you expend in trying to explain why and how you are doing what you are doing is sustenance to them.
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Instead, the only effective way to break contact is to walk away. Silently. Independently. ⁠
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This is not only kind to them but more importantly, kind to YOU. ⁠
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Here are some of the ways in which you can work with me when you are ready: online, self-led foundational course (Finding Freedom); online supported programme alongside twice-monthly group coaching calls (Making Peace With Your Past), or one-to-one guidance (Private Client work) ♥️

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