19/04/2026
CARRONVALE 0-1 DSC
Match day 4 for the o35s
Dunblane’s ageing Invincibles nearly sank in the Grangemouth mud on Friday night, but their warrior spirit gave them a narrow away victory over their title rivals.
On hearing midweek news the game would be on grass instead of astroturf, coach Mcavoy’s men were sent scurrying to their attics and lofts to find screw-in studs. Alas, Dunblane Museum refused to give Paul Rodgers his boots back, so he had to miss out, while fellow striker Robertson preferred Disneyland to Little Kerse, and is sure to face internal disciplinary proceedings.
Long term absentees Wilbert of Dukla Pumpherston and McInnes of Bridge of Allan are no closer to a return, although McClymont may be limping back soon. The unfortunate Wilbert has smashed his ankle and is said to have taken on a new hobby browsing local book stores. While the word on the street is McInnes may be put down like a racehorse. The Dunblane Soccer Club family wishes them all well.
So personnel changes had to be made from last week’s skelping of Eastfield. There was a recall for Geddes -- who knows a thing or two about grass as well as other substances - and Constable Purves, who doesn’t stand for any of that nonsense. That meant veterans Cameron Pratt and Gerry Gay were left on the sidelines comparing scars and exchanging war stories.
The Battle of the Somme was fought on a better surface than the one facing Mcavoy’s troops. But just like Field Marshall Hague, he sent his men over the top with a clear order to march towards enemy lines, and win at all costs. The squidgy terrain would ask questions of Dunblane’s passing culture – but it took a while for an answer to be found.
When a football match eventually broke out, Dunblane took a measure of control. It wasn’t long before a McClure burst forced a desperate Carronshore hack inside the box. Penalty! After sclaffing home a spot-kick in a previous game, ‘Tojo’ Duncanson retained the kicking honour. Now, in the words of the Queen, recollections vary about his effort. Tojo’s PR team claim a wonder save from the home goalie, while others were heard whispering he could’ve thrown his bunnet on it. In any event, it was a missed penalty – the best chance for either side in the first half. Although we must mention Tom EU who shanked hopelessly wide and high from close range. And McClure and Mann tested the tiny but youthful Carronshore goalkeeper, who could easily have qualified as a grandchild of Skipper Oco Melvin.
Just like the Great War, as the bodies piled up, and the minutes ticked by, stalemate set in. Coach Mcavoy called on his subs. Pratt and Gay fought together in the Boer War and brought all that bitter experience to Dunblane’s second half offensive, as the away side crawled through the sludge and pressed for victory.
And it was our resident Sassenach warrior – Tom Ellerton-Unwin of England – who invoked the spirit of Henry V at Agincourt, piercing Carronshore hearts late on. Some say that Gay scrambled his way into the opposition box, and a block off his backside landed, somehow, at the feet of Big Tom. But this observer couldn’t get a proper view of the attack so we will assume he ghosted past three Carronshore defenders, before laying it on a silver platter for TEU. Whatever the lead-up, Tom swivelled and half-duffed a shot into the bottom corner to hoots of glee from the Dunblane players, and their legions of supporters.
And that’s how it ended. Last word to the mercurial Mark Donnelly who won a deserved man of the match from the voting public. This was despite a second half shot that went so high, watching geometrists were left scratching their heads.
Onwards, then, the Invincibles march, to Kincardine in late April, and a welcome return to good old-fashioned astroturf.
