07/31/2024
Biggest secret I’ve kept so far from you guys…
I was a divorcee at age 28! I was in a relationship with my ex for 11 years, met him my last year of high school and married him 7 years later when I was 24! I want to share this in an effort to normalize divorce and that it’s not a shameful thing to go through!!
To be honest, I kept my divorce from my employers, colleagues and acquaintances for a long time because I felt like it was a shameful thing. It’s also a huge taboo in Asian culture to be divorced! It’s also admitting that I failed at something big.
So why did I end the marriage?
No marriages end overnight. I was unhappy for a long time. I was uninspired by him. I didn’t feel like an equal in our marriage, I was very resentful how much I had to do in our relationship. I never felt like there was any effort on his end. I stayed and tried for a long time. But at the end, I finally came to terms with my decision to leave. It was the most difficult decision of my life but also the BEST one I made. I finally said “screw his happiness, screw his family’s happiness and approval, screw what people think around me! I am putting my own happiness first!” That was when I let go and ended it.
A marriage/relationship takes work, compromise, and it is a true partnership. It means you should feel appreciated, loved, inspired, and not feeling alone in this thing called life.
I’m an example that you can find true love again after your first failed marriage. There is nothing worth more than your own happiness! When you find the right person, doing this thing called life should be easy or easier!
So never give up on yourself. Prioritize your happiness. It’s OK to be selfish.
My husband and I have been happily married for over 6 years now, and we have 2 beautiful children together. Our marriage isn’t perfect but I would say it’s pretty darn close 😍 and I would say yes over and over again every day!
📸 Photo credit