08/06/2026
Grand Final – Hogs vs The Misfits
The outfield had improved considerably. The sun continued its generous contribution to proceedings, the clouds seemingly opting for a sleep-in, and conditions were drying rapidly.
It looked like a perfect day for cricket.
The Misfits won the toss and, without hesitation, sent the Hogs in to bat.
K. Davey (2 off 3) and G. Davern (16 off 13) strode out to open proceedings once again. Unfortunately for the Hogs faithful, whose hopes quietly rested on Davey's usual brand of controlled violence, disaster struck early. Attempting to force the issue, Davey chopped one back onto his stumps and was on his way. The Misfits had the breakthrough they wanted.
The Pig (21 off 20) joined Davern and the pair recognised early that this was not a day for reckless abandon. Every run would need to be mined from the pitch like a precious mineral. They ran hard between the wickets, turning ones into twos and twos into threes whenever possible. Boundaries were scarce, but the scoreboard ticked over steadily.
Most remarkably, The Pig was spotted leaving deliveries outside off stump. Witnesses are divided on whether this was tactical awareness or temporary confusion.
At 1/36 in the seventh over, Davern's promising innings came to an end when he too chopped on, much to the delight of the opposition.
J. Douce (9 off 10), fresh from his semi-final heroics, arrived looking to repeat the dose. He and The Pig attempted to rebuild, but momentum remained frustratingly elusive. Then came another of those LBW decisions that tend to look considerably worse when you're batting. The Pig was sent on his way, once again wearing the expression of a man who had several questions and no appeals remaining.
At 3/48 after 10 overs, the Hogs were in trouble.
J. Dobson (11 off 13) attempted to inject some life into the innings while Douce looked to find the boundary, but the latter was caught in the deep trying to cash in on a ball he fancied. With wickets falling and overs disappearing, the lower order was forced into attack mode.
One bright spot came courtesy of C. Baker, who briefly treated spectators to an exhibition of clean striking. Arriving at the crease, he launched a magnificent six over mid-on before following it up with a boundary through almost exactly the same postcode on the next delivery. It was batting of the highest quality and, sadly, about 60 runs too late.
The innings eventually fizzled out in the 13th over, the Hogs dismissed for a paltry 71.
It wasn't the total anyone had envisioned. In truth, it wasn't really the total anyone had feared either.
Defending 71 would require som**hing extraordinary.
The required offerings had been made to the fickle cricket gods beforehand. Superstitions were observed. Rituals were honoured. Sacrifices, at least metaphorically, were made.
Unfortunately, the cricket gods had already placed their bets elsewhere.
Buddah (0/41 off 3) and K. Davey (0/22 off 3) took the new ball hoping to conjure a miracle, but the Misfits openers had little interest in drama. Throwing caution to the wind, they attacked from the outset and were rewarded handsomely.
Boundaries flowed freely. Sixes appeared to be available at heavily discounted prices. Every attempt by the Hogs to create pressure was met with another powerful stroke.
The target was reached without loss in the seventh over.
And just like that, the season was over.
The scorecard makes for grim reading, particularly after all the work required to reach the grand final. But perspective is important. The Hogs battled their way through the season, reached the final day, and ran into a side that resembled less a social cricket team and more a fully funded franchise operation.
Sometimes it's simply a case of a very big fish swimming in a very small pond.
To all the players, supporters, scorers, spectators and assorted hangers-on who helped throughout the season: thank you.
A grand final defeat is never how you want the story to end, but reaching the final was an achievement in itself. Heads should be held high.
Be proud of the effort, fellahs.
Until next season.